中等長英語笑話帶翻譯

　　隨著近十年網路和手機的飛速發展，隨之出現了網路笑話，網路流行語，給力大全，手機笑話，雷人語句，笑料聯盟等，促使笑話發展到一個新的階段。本文是，希望對大家有幫助!

　　：離婚

　　A husband and wife,both 91,stood before a judge,asking for a divorce."I don't understand,"He said,"Why do you want a divorce at this time of life?"the husband explained "Well , you see,We wanted to wait until the children died."

　　有一個丈夫和妻子都是91歲，他們站在法官面前，要求離婚。“我不明白，”法官說，“你們為什麼到了這把年紀還要離婚?”丈夫解釋道：“嗯，你是知道的，我們以前是喲等到孩子們都死了。”

　　：輕率的插話

　　The fine-furniture store where I work has been in business since the 1920s. Recently I received a call from a woman who wanted to replace some chairs from a dining set purchased from us in the 1930s. I assured her we could help and sought the assistance of the office manager. "You'll never believe this one, " I told him." I just got a call from a customer who bought some chairs from us in the 1930s. " Before I could finish repeating her request, he interrupted and said, "Don't tell me she hasn't received them yet!"

　　我所工作的精品傢俱商店是從20世紀二十年代以來就營業的。最近我接到一個婦女的電話。她想換一套餐具中的一些椅子。這套餐具她是在三十年代從我們這兒買的。我向她保證說我們可以幫她的忙，於是我向部門經理尋求幫助。“你永遠也不會相信，”我對他說，“我剛接到一個顧客的電話，她在三十年代從我們這裡買了一些椅子。” 我還沒來得及說她的要求，經理就打斷了我的話：“你別告訴我她到現在還沒收到貨!”

　　：決鬥

　　Little Pete came home from the playground with a bloody1 nose, black eye, and torn clothing.

　　小彼得從操場回到家時，鼻子流血、黑眼圈及被撕破了衣服。

　　It was obvious he'd been in a bad fight and lost. His father asked his son what happened. "Well, Dad," said Pete, "I challenged Larry to a duel2. And, you know, I gave him his choice of weapons."

　　顯然他剛與人惡鬥了一番，而且打輸了。父親問兒子發生了什麼事。“噢，爸爸，彼得說，我向拉里挑起決鬥，而且我讓他挑選武器。”

　　"Uh-huh," said the father, "that seems fair."

　　“嗯，”父親說，“這看上去很公平!”

　　"I know, but I never thought he'd choose his sister!"

　　“我知道，但我沒想到他選擇了他姐姐!”

　　：都不是

　　It was local election time and the candidate was visiting all the houses in his area.

　　正值當地競選時期，候選人到他的區域的千家萬戶登門拜訪。

　　At one house a small boy answered the door. "Tell me, young man," said the politician. "Is your Mommy in the Republican Party or the Democratic Party?"

　　候選人來到了一家門口，一個小男孩開了門。“告訴我，年輕人，”候選人問道，“你母親是在共和黨還是在民主黨?”

　　"Neither," said the child, "she's in the bathroom."

　　“都不是，”孩子答到，“她在浴室。”