幽默減壓英語小故事

　　當壓力大山大時，閱讀英語笑話不失為一種很好的減壓方法，下面小編為大家帶來，歡迎大家閱讀收藏!

　　1:

　　Teacher had set his class an essay in "A Game of Cricket".After two minutes Simon Steel handed his paper in and was allowed to go home.

　　老師給學生出了個作文題:“一場板球賽”。兩分鐘後，西蒙·斯蒂爾交了作文，老師允許他回家了。

　　His essay read:"Rain stopped play."

　　他在作文上寫道:“下雨，比賽中止。”

　　2:

　　Our teacher was telling us about a new system of memory training being used in someschools today.

　　我們的老師正在給我們介紹現在某些學校使用的一種新的記憶訓練系統。

　　“It works like this，”she said. "Suppose you wanted to remember the name of a poet-Robert Burns，for instance.”She told us to think of him as Bobby Burns.“Now get in your head a picture of a London policeman，a bobby in flames. See? Bobby Burns!”

　　“這個系統是這樣的，”她說。“假定你要記住一個詩人的名字一一例如，要記住羅伯特·彭斯的名字。”她告訴我們把他當作博比·彭斯。“讓你的腦海裡閃現出一個倫敦警察的形象，燃燒著的警察。明白嗎?警察燃燒!”

　　“I see what you mean，”said the class know it all.“But how can you tell that it's not Robert Browning?”

　　“我明白你的意思，”班上的萬事通說。“但是你怎麼能說那就不是羅伯特·布朗寧呢?”

　　3:

　　Proctor***exceedingly angry***:So you confess that this unfortunate freshman was carried to this frog pond and drenched?Now what part did you take in this disgraceful affair?

　　學監***非常生氣***:現在你承認這可憐的新生被扔進這蛙池裡，渾身溼透?那麼你在這不光彩的事情裡扮演了什麼角色呢?

　　Sophomore***meekly***:The right leg，sir.

　　二年級學生***恭順地***:右腿，先生。

　　4:

　　Landon had made an unsuccessful attempt at the recitation，and the doctor，somewhat nettled，said:“Landon，you don't seem to be getting on very fast in this subject. You seem to lack ambition.Why，at your age Alexander the Great had conquered half the world.

　　蘭登作了一次不成功的朗誦。教授有點不悅，對他說道:“蘭登，你在這門課上好像進步不大，你好像缺乏志向。亞歷山大大帝在你這個年齡可已經征服了半個世界。”

　　"Yes，”said Landon，"he couldn’t help it，for you will recall the fact, doctor, that Alexander the Great had Aristotle for a teacher.”

　　“是啊，”蘭登說，“他沒法不那樣。教授先生，您回想一下史實，亞歷山大大帝有亞里士多德做他的老師。”