英語簡短幽默笑話帶翻譯

　　從古到今,笑話是人們生活中不可缺少的“調劑品”。笑話使人們在刻板的生活中感到一絲快意和放鬆，在人們的日常生活中起著重要調劑作用。下面小編為大家帶來，希望大家喜歡!

　　英語簡短幽默笑話1：

　　My friend, celebrating a special occasion，went to a restaurant and ordered what she thought would be a lobster tail. But to her dismay，the entire crustacean was on her plate.

　　為了慶祝一個特殊的日子，我的朋友來到了一家飯店要了一個她認為是龍蝦尾的菜。然而讓她不安的是，在她面前盤子裡盛著一整隻大龍燈。

　　"He's looking right at me!”she exclaimed to the waiter. "I just can't eat him.’

　　“它在盯著我，”她向服務員解釋說:“我可害怕吃這傢伙。”

　　The waiter removed her plate，but returned it a few moments later. The lobster now had a blindfold neatly tied around its eyes.

　　服務員把龍蝦端了下去，過了一會兒又把它拿了回來，只見那盤子裡的龍蝦的眼睛上戴上了一副眼罩。

　　英語簡短幽默笑話2：

　　At the bank where I was employed as a teller we were not allowed to eat while working. But one day，five months pregnant，I was ravenous. I opened a bag of potato chips and started to devour them. Just then I spotted one of our best customers and his wife heading my way. Quickly, I wiped my mouth and greeted them. As I processed their transaction，I noticed they were looking at me oddly.

　　在銀行我做出納員，這裡規定工作時不許吃東西。但有一天，我因懷孕五個月有點嘴饞，打開了一包土豆片，開始偷吃起來。這時，我看見一個熟悉的顧客和他的妻子朝我的視窗走來。我匆忙地擦了一下嘴，向他們打了個招呼。當我在給他們辦理業務時，我注意到他們一直用一種異樣的目光看著我。

　　On their way out, the man said,“I don't understand these young people.”

　　在他們往外走的路上，那個男的說:“我真搞不懂這些年輕人。’，

　　"Dear，that's a fashion statement，”his wife explained."It's a new type of brooch.”

　　“親愛的，那是新潮。”他的妻子說;“那是一種新型的胸針飾物。”

　　I looked down to see what could have caused such controversy. To my horror，a large potato chip was resting neatly on my left shoulder.

　　我低頭上下打量了一下我自己，想找到是什麼東西引起了他們這樣說我。使我大吃一驚的是，一大塊土豆片穩穩當當地落在我的左肩上。

　　英語簡短幽默笑話3：

　　Several years had passed since I worked for the federal government，but old habits died hard. A cable-television technician had just finished hooking up our service at home and told me he needed the 2185. I hadn't heard about this form before arid asked him，" Where can I get that form'2185'"?

　　我從聯邦政府退下來已經好幾年了，但有些習慣卻很難改掉。一個有線電視的技術工人給我家連線完天線後，對我說他要2185。我以前從沒聽見這個代號，便問:“我到哪兒能

　　領到這種表格?”

　　Looking at me peculiarly, he replied."Ma'am，it's money.$21.85. "

　　那位工人吃驚地望了我一會兒，說:“夫人，那是錢，21塊8毛5。”