地道英語幽默笑話帶翻譯

　　笑話使人們在刻板的生活中感到一絲快意和放鬆，在人們的日常生活中起著重要調劑作用。下面小編為大家帶來，歡迎大家閱讀!

　　地道英語幽默笑話1：

　　The world's cheapest man finally went to the dentist to have his teeth fixed,

　　一個非常吝嗇的守財奴終於去牙科看牙齒。

　　"Well, sir," said the dentist,

　　“先生，”牙醫說道，

　　"I'm afraid you've waited too long to get these teeth attended to. They'll all have to come out.”

　　“恐怕你拖得太久了，這些牙齒都要拔掉才行。

　　"How much will that cost?" inquired the skinflint.

　　“那得花多少錢?，’小氣鬼問醫生。

　　"A thousand dollars. "

　　“一千塊美金。”

　　Here 's a hundred ,"said the tightwad ,"Just loosen them up a bit.""

　　“這裡是一百塊，”吝嗇鬼說。“只要稍微把它們鬆動一點就好

　　地道英語幽默笑話2：

　　A Jew opens a kosher restaurant in London and puts a notice in the window:"ARABS NOT WELCOME"; a couple of days later, a person of obviously Arab origin walks in and requests a sandwich-so the cashier quickly runs into the office asking what to do. The owner decides that he really doesn’t want a scandal，so he orders，"OK，give him the sandwich, but charge him double--that should teach him."

　　一個猶太人在倫敦開了一家猶太教餐館，在餐館的窗戶上寫著:“阿拉伯人不許入內”的字樣。過了幾天，一個特徵鮮明的阿拉伯人走進餐館想要一個三明治。收銀員馬上跑到辦公室問該怎麼辦。餐館老闆不想惹事生非，於是就說，“好吧，賣他一個三明治，但是要收他兩倍錢，這樣就能給他一個教訓了。”

　　But the next day the same Arab is back again一this time for a full lunch; the owner decides" Charge him triple，he’11 get the lesson this time!” The Arab eats his lunch, pays without a quibble, praises the food and even asks for a reservation for 10 of his friends for the same evening. The owner decides`OK,1et him have the reservation, but if his friends do come，charge them tenfold!” The Arabs appear in the evening, have a large dinner, pay without complaining and even tip generously. So the next day the owner puts a new sign in the window: "JEWS NOT WELCOME."

　　但是第二天，那個阿拉伯人又來了，這回他要了一整套午餐。老闆決定收他三倍的錢，這樣他就知道厲害了!那個阿拉伯人吃過午餐後通通快快的付了錢，還稱讚食物非常好吃，甚至預定了當天晚上十個人的晚餐。老闆想了想說:“沒問題，就讓他預定，但是等他的朋友來了就收他們十倍的錢!”等到晚上，那些阿拉伯人真的來了，點了好多菜，毫無怨言地付了十倍的錢，而且還大方地給了不少小費。於是第三天，老闆在窗戶上寫了一行新字:“猶太人不許人內”。

　　地道英語幽默笑話3：

　　And You Think You've Got Problems

　　你認為你有問題嗎?

　　"Boy, have I got problems!" the man said to the psychiatrist.

　　“乖乖，我真的有毛病了!”一位老兄對精神病醫生說道。

　　"Go ahead and tell me about them "

　　“繼續說，告訴我你的問題。”

　　"Well, to start with, I've got an estate in the country,three Mercedes and a luxury yacht. ."

　　“喔，是這樣的，我在鄉下有房地產，另外還有三輛賓士和一艘豪華遊艇。”

　　"So, what's the problem?"

　　"那問題在哪裡呢?"

　　"I only make $ 100 a week!"