中英文對照英語笑話閱讀

　　默與笑話作為人們調侃、娛樂或諷刺的一種方式,是能供人們消遣或交際的一種創造性藝術化的語言形式。下面是小編帶來的，歡迎閱讀!

　　篇一

　　Only a few words 幾個英語詞

　　At a court the judge is interrogating a mugger***行凶搶劫者*** but gets into difficulty because the mugger is a foreigner who doesn't speak English. Don't you speak English at all? the judge asks. Only a few words, replies the mugger.

　　What words do you know?

　　Your purse or your life!

　　法庭上法官正審問一個搶劫犯，由於該犯是一個不會說英語的外國人，審問很困難。你一點英語都不會說嗎?法官問。我只會說幾個詞，搶劫犯回答。

　　你會說哪幾個詞?

　　你是要錢還是要命!

　　篇二

　　An Ugly Woman 醜女

　　Mike: My aunt was very embarrassed when she was asked to take off her mask at the party. Mary: Why was that? Mike: She wasn't wearing one.

　　麥克：一次舞會上，當大家要求我姑姑拿掉她的面具時，她非常尷尬。 瑪麗：為什麼會那樣呢? 麥克：她根本就沒有帶面具。

　　篇三

　　Time is money 時間就是金錢

　　As the taxi came to a screeching***尖叫*** halt at a traffic light, I asked the driver, "Do you agree that 'Time is money'?"

　　"Well, it's a very common saying. Who will care so much about that?" the driver answered.

　　"Look, the digits in the meter***儀表*** are still running when the car has stopped, "Ipointed at the meter.

　　"Oh, yes. You've got a point here. In this case, time is money for both of us." added the driver.

　　當計程車在遇到紅燈急剎車時，我問司機：“你同意‘時間就是金錢’這種說法嗎?”

　　“哦，這是一個普遍說法。在這個問題上，誰會在意那麼多呢?”司機回答說。

　　“看，在車已經停止的情況下，里程錶上的數字還在跑。”我指著里程錶說。

　　“哦，是的。你說的挺有道理的。在這種情況下，時間對我們倆來說都是金錢。”司機補充說。

　　篇四

　　I wasn't dead 我還沒死

　　A young man fell into a state of coma, but recovered before his friends had buried him. One of them asked what it felt like to be dead.

　　"Dead!" he exclaimed. "I wasn't dead. And I knew I wasn't, because my feet were cold and I was hungry."

　　"But how did that make you sure?"

　　"Well, I knew that if I were in heaven I shouldn't be hungry, and if I was in the other place my feet wouldn't be cold."

　　一個年輕人昏死了過去，但是當他的朋友們要掩埋他的時候卻又甦醒過來。他的一個朋友問他死的感覺是怎樣的。

　　“死!”他喊道“我並沒有死，我知道我沒死，因為我的腳是涼的，而我又很餓。”

　　“你怎麼能肯定你沒死?”

　　“當然哪，我知道如果我上了天堂，我就不會覺得餓;如果我下到地獄，那我的腳就不會是涼的了。”

　　篇五

　　I was the foreman 我是領班

　　Peter was telling a friend that he had just lost his job.

　　"Why did the foreman***領班*** fire you?" the friend asked in surprise.

　　"Oh," Peter said, "you know how foreman are. They stand around with their hands in theirpockets watching everybody else work."

　　"We all know that," replied his friend. "But why did he let you go?"

　　"Jealousy," answered Pete. "All the other workers thought I was the foreman."

　　皮特告訴他的朋友他剛剛丟掉了工作。

　　“為什麼領班會開除你?”朋友詫異地問。

　　“哦，”皮特說，“你知道領班是什麼樣的人。他們總是把手插在口袋了，站在旁邊看其他人工作。”

　　“我們知道是這樣。”朋友回答說。“但是為什麼他會讓你走?”

　　“嫉妒。”皮特回答。“其他所有的工人都認為我是領班。”