關於英語笑話故事帶翻譯

　　笑話由於其滑稽可笑的特點而為人們長久以來所喜愛。本文是，希望對大家有幫助!

　　：A Life for a Life

　　以“命”抵命

　　The English author, Richard Savage, was once living inLondon in great poverty. In order to earn a little money he hadwritten the story of his life, but not many copies of the bookhad been sold in the shops, and Savage was living from hand tomouth. As a result of his lack of food he became very ill, but after a time, owing to the skill of the doctor who had lookedafter him, he got well again.

　　英國作家理查德·薩維奇一度在倫敦過著貧困潦倒的生活，為了賺幾個錢，他曾寫了有關他自己生平的故事。但是這部書在書店裡並沒有賣出幾本，薩維奇過著朝不保夕的日子。由於缺乏食物，他病得很厲害。後來，由於給他治療的那個醫生的高明醫術，他才又恢復了健康。

　　After a week or two the doctorsent a bill to Savage for his visits, but poor Savage hadn't anymoney and couldn't pay it. The doctor waited for another month and sent the bill again. But still no money came. Afterseveral weeks he sent it to him again asking for his money. Inthe end he came to Savage's house and asked him for payment, saying to Savage, “You know you owe your life to me and Iexpected some gratitude from you.”

　　過了一兩個星期之後，醫生給薩維奇送來了一張討要診費的帳單，但是貧窮的薩維奇沒有錢來償付。醫生等了一個月後又送來了帳單，但仍然未索回分文。幾個星期之後，他又送來帳單要錢。最後，醫生本人來到了薩維奇的家中，對他說：“你明白，你是欠我一條命的，我希望你有所報答。”

　　“I agree,” said Savage, “that I owe my life to you, and toprove to you that I am not ungrateful for your work I will givemy life to you.”

　　“是的，”薩維奇說，“我是欠你一條命，為了向你證明我對你的診治不是不報答，我將把我的命給你。”

　　With these words he handed to him two volumes entitled,The life of Richard Savage.

　　說著這番話，薩維奇遞給醫生兩卷書，名叫《理查德·薩維奇的一生》。

　　：基本原則

　　One of my favorite teachers at Southeast Missouri State University in Cape Girardeau wasknown of his droll sense of humor. Explaining his ground rules to one freshman class, he said, "Now I know my lectures can often be dry and boring, so I don't mind if you look at yourwatches during class. I do, however, object to your pounding them on the desk to make surethey're still running."

　　位於吉拉多海角的密蘇里東南州立大學有一位我非常喜歡的老師，他奇特的幽默感很是出名。在對一個新生班級講解他的基本原則時，他說：“我知道我的講課可能經常會枯燥乏味，了無生趣，所以如果你們在上課時看錶我並不介意。不過我堅決反對你們將表在課桌上猛敲看它們是不是還在走。”

　　：他的得數只比正確答案多二

　　Jack Hawkins was the football coach at an Amercian college, and he was always trying to findgood players, but they weren't always smart enought to be accepted by the college. One daythe coach brought an excellent young player to the dean of the college and asked that thestudent be allowed to enter without an examination. "Well," the dean said after somepersuasion, "I'd better ask him a few questions first." Then he turned to the student andasked him some very easy questions, but the student didn't know any of the answers. At lastthe dean said, "Well, what's five times seven?" The student thought for a long time and thenanswered, "Thirty-six." The dean threw up his hands and looked at the coach in despair, butthe coach said earnestly, "Oh, please let him in, sir! He was only wrong by two."

　　傑克霍金斯是美國一所學院的橄欖球隊教練，他竭力想物色好球員。但是好球員學業不行，院方不願錄取。 有一天，教練帶著一位優秀的年輕球員去見院長，希望院方同意他免試入學。經過一番勸說後院長說：“那我最好先問問他幾個問題。” 然後他轉向學生，問了幾個非常簡單的問題。可是那個學生一個也答不上來。 最後院長說：“那麼，五乘七得多少?” 學生想了很久，然後回答說：“三十六。” 院長攤開雙手失望地看了看教練。可是教練認真地說，“噢，錄取他吧，先生。他的答案只比正確答案多二。”