英語小笑話短篇故事閱讀
笑話***анекдот***是民族文化不可或缺的一部分。透過笑話我們可以看到一個民族的生存環境、生活方式、社會關係和心理特徵等等。小編分享短篇英語小笑話故事，希望可以幫助大家!
短篇英語小笑話故事：疼痛之極
A construction worker was rushed to the hospital after cutting himself badly. The doctor told the nurse to prepare a painkiller. "Don’t bother Doctor," said the man. "I' ve been through a lot worse."
一個傷痕累累的建築工人衝進了一家醫院，醫生馬上讓護士去拿止痛藥，“不必麻煩您了，醫生。”那人說道，“比這更痛的傷我都經歷過了。”
"More painful than this?" the doctor asked.
“比現在的傷還要痛嗎?”醫生問。
"I’11 tell you about the second most painful accident I ever had. I was hunting one day and had to take a shit so I dropped my pants and squatted. I tripped a bear trap and BOOM，the thing snapped shut on my balls."
“我先說說讓我感到還不是最痛苦的那件事吧，一天我在打獵的時候突然想要大便，於是就脫掉褲子蹲在地上，不料被捕熊的夾子絆倒了，那東西夾住了我的皋丸。”
The doctor winced, "That’s awful. But tell me, what could be worse?"
醫生聽後顫抖了一下，說道“太可怕了，那告訴我什麼又是最痛苦的事呢?”
"When I reached the end of the chain."
“當我摸到鎖鏈盡端的時候。”
短篇英語小笑話故事：教育階段
The dean of Engineering had once walked into a class, and said "Good Morning.”
一天工程系的主任走進一個班，說道:“早上好。”
The whole class chorused" Good Morning”
全班齊聲回覆:“早上好。”
"Hi，you are freshmen aren’t you?" he asked.
“你們是大一的吧?”主任問道。
One student bolder than the others asked him how he knew.
一個膽子比較大的同學問主任是怎麼知道的。
"Well，”he said. "When I say‘Good Morning' to a class，if they are freshmen they say Good Morning' too. If they are sophomores，they quietly fold their papers away，and look at me. A class of juniors will look at me over the top of their papers, and then get back to them. A class of seniors will ignore my greeting, and keep reading the papers. When I say `Good Morning' to a class of graduate students, they write it down.”
“嗯，”主任說，“如果是大一的新生，當我向他們問早上好的時候，他們也一定會說‘早上好’的。如果他們是大二的學生，他們會輕輕地合上課本，然後集體望著我。大三的學生則會從書本上抬起頭看我一眼，然後馬上又繼續讀書了。大四的學生則會對我視而不見，繼續看書。至於研究生班的學生，我向他們問早上好，他們就會把這句話寫在筆記上。”
短篇英語小笑話故事：死在波蘭人手裡
A few nights ago a few friends and I were in a bar, telling all the polish jokes we knew; boy what a feast! Anyway，I ducked into the restroom to sprinkle the old porcelain. While I was in there, a big guy came in and said to me，"Hey pal, I’m Polish and I don’t like you telling all those Polish jokes!”
幾天前，我和幾個朋友在酒吧裡講所知道的關於波蘭人的笑話。大家都笑得東倒西歪。過了一會兒，我進了洗手間去方便，這時一個壯漢走到我身邊說:“嘿，夥計，我就是波蘭人，我討厭剛才你說的那些有關波蘭人的笑話。”
So I said，“"ell，they' re not against you，pal , just against anyone in Poland.”“My mother is in Poland!”He screams，and pulls out a razor. Boy was I scared! I was sure he would have killed me if he had found a place to plug it in!
我回答說:“行了，我又不是針對你說的，只不過是說那些在波蘭的人。”“我媽媽就在波蘭!”他吼道，然後抽出一把剃刀，我被嚇壞了!我敢肯定，如果他認為我身上有什麼地方可以插進他手中那把剃刀的話，他一定會殺了我的!