英語小笑話表演稿精選

　　笑話是內容豐富並具有出乎意料結尾的幽默口頭故事。笑話幾乎涵蓋人們生活的所有領域,其中包括政治笑話、經濟笑話、家庭生活笑話、關於民族性格的笑話等。小編精心收集了英語小笑話表演稿，供大家欣賞學習!

　　英語小笑話表演稿篇1

　　Three pastors in the south were having lunch in a diner. One said, You know, since summer started I’ve been having trouble with bats in my loft***閣樓*** and attic at church. I’ve tried everything----noise, spray, cats----nothing seems to scare them away.

　　Another said, Yes, me too. I’ve got hundreds living in my belfry***鐘樓*** and in the attic. I’ve been had the place fumigated***熏製*** , and they still won’t go away.

　　The third said, I baptized***洗禮*** all mine, and made them members of the church...haven’t seen one back since!

　　三個南部的牧師在一家小餐館裡吃午飯。其中的一個說道：“你們知道嗎，自從夏天來臨，我的教堂的閣樓和頂樓就被蝙蝠騷擾，我用盡了一切辦法----噪音、噴霧、貓----似乎什麼都不能把它們趕走。”

　　另外一位說：“是啊，我也是。在我的鐘樓和閣樓也有好幾百只。我曾經請人把整個地方用煙燻消毒一遍，它們還是趕不走。”

　　第三個牧師說：“我為我那裡的所有蝙蝠洗禮，讓它們成為教會的一員......從此一隻也沒有再回來過。”

　　英語小笑話表演稿篇2

　　The ability of the Kangaroo

　　The zoo built a special eight-foot-high enclosure for its newly acquired kangaroo, but the next morning the animal was found hopping around outside. The height of the fence was increased to 15 feet, but the kangaroo got out again. Exasperated, the zoo director had the height increased to 30 feet, but the kangaroo still escaped. A giraffe asked the kangaroo, "How high do you think they'll build the fence?" "I don't know, " said the kangaroo. "Maybe a thousand feet if they keep leaving the gate unlocked.

　　袋鼠的能力

　　動物園為剛引進的袋鼠建了一個特殊的八英尺高的圍牆。但是第二天早上，人們發現這動物在圍牆外面蹦跳著。於是圍牆高度增加到十五英尺，但袋鼠還是跑了出來。動物園經理甚感惱火，又叫人把圍牆高度加到三十英尺，但袋鼠還是逃了出來。一個長頸鹿問袋鼠：“你認為他們會把圍牆建到多高?” “我不知道，”袋鼠說，“如果他們繼續開著大門，可能要修到一千英尺吧。”

　　英語小笑話表演稿篇3

　　The great painter was asked, one day to paint a picture of Pharaoh crossing the Red Sea. A little while after the picture had been commenced, a hitch***故障*** arose over the fee, and Hogarth found that he would have to complete the commission for about half the sum he expected. When the work was completed, the patron***贊助人，主顧*** was asked to come and inspect it. As a matter of fact, the picture was just one daub***塗抹，塗料*** of brilliant red.What's this? exclaimed the purchaser. I asked for the Red Sea, on the occasion of the celebrated passage.That's it, replied Hogarth.But, where are the Israelites?They are all gone over.Where are the Egyptians?They're all drowned.

　　一天，有人請這位偉大的畫家畫一幅法老王渡紅海圖。這幅畫剛開始不久，酬金就出現了問題。霍迪斯發現，完成這幅畫後，他只能得到他想要的大約一半的錢。當作品完成之後，那位主顧被請來看畫。其實，這幅畫不過是胡亂塗抹的一片鮮紅。這是什麼?那位買主喊了起來。我要的是紅海，是那次著名的航海。這就是，霍迦斯回答說。可是以色列人在哪兒?他們都已經渡過去了。埃及人在哪兒?他們全都淹死了。