英語故事搞笑幽默

　　英語故事教學不僅能有效地學習英語知識,亦能有效地培養學生的思維能力。小編精心收集了搞笑幽默英語故事，供大家欣賞學習!

　　搞笑幽默英語故事篇1

　　A drunk

　　醉漢

　　A police officer pulls over a guy who has been weaving in and out of the lanes.

　　有一位警官把一個在車道上穿進穿出，迂迴蛇行的男子攔到路邊。

　　He goes up to the guy's window and says "Sir,I need you to blow into this breathalyzer tube."

　　他走到這名男子的車窗旁邊說：“先生，我要你對著這個酒精測試管吹一口氣。”

　　The man says,"Sorry officer I can't do that.I am an asthmatic.If I do that I'll have a really badasthma attack."

　　這名男子說：“對不起呀，警官，我不能吹呀。我是個氣喘病患者呀。如果我吹的話，我就會真的患很嚴重的氣喘病。”

　　"Ok,fine.I need you to come down to the station to give a blood sample."

　　“ 好， 好。我要你到警察局進行血液檢驗。”

　　"I can't do that either.I am a hemophiliac.If I do that,I'll bleed to death."

　　“我也能抽血檢驗呀。我是個血友病患呀。如果我抽血檢驗，我就會流血過多而死呀。”

　　"Well ,then we need a urine sample."

　　“嗯，那我們就要你進行尿液檢驗吧。”

　　"I am sorry officer I can't do that either.I am also a diabetic.If I do that I'll get really low bloodsugar."

　　“對不起呀 ，警官，我也不能驗尿呀。我也是一個糖尿病患者呀。如果我驗尿的話，我的血糖就真的會變得很低。”

　　"Alright then I need you to come out here and walk this white line."

　　“好吧，那我要你出來到這邊，走這條白線。”

　　"I can't do that,officer."

　　“警官，我辦不到呀。”

　　"Why not? "

　　“為什麼辦不到?”

　　"Because I am too drunk to do that."

　　“因為我喝得太醉了，所以不能那麼做呀。”

　　搞笑幽默英語故事篇2

　　Idiot Teacher

　　白痴老師

　　If there are any idiots in the room,will they please stand up?" said the sarcastic teacher .

　　喜愛挖苦人的老師說：“如果在這間教室裡面有白痴，就請站起來好嗎?”。

　　After a long silence,one rreshman rose to his feet,

　　沉默了很久之後，有一名新生就站起來了。

　　"Now then mister ,why do you consider yourself an idiot? "enquired the teacher with a sneer.

　　老師就以譏笑的口氣問他：“喂， 先生，你為什麼認為你自己是個白痴呀?”

　　"Well ,actually I don't,"said the student ,"but I hate to see you standing up there all byyourself."

　　這名學生說：“ 唉呀，實際上我才不認為我是個白痴呢，而是我很討厭看著你一個人站在那裡啦。”

　　搞笑幽默英語故事篇3

　　Silly Doctor

　　蠢醫生

　　A man went to see his doctor

　　有一名男子去看他的醫生，

　　because he was suffering from a miserable cold.

　　因為他正遭到令人難受的感冒之苦。

　　His doctor prescribed some pills,

　　他的醫生開了一些藥丸 ，

　　but they didn't help.

　　但是這些藥丸都沒什麼幫助。

　　On his next visit the doctor gave him a shot,

　　他笫二次去的時候，醫生給他打針，

　　but that didn't do any good.

　　但是那也沒什麼效。

　　On his third visit the doctor told the man,

　　他第三次去的時候 ，醫生告訴這名男子：

　　"Go home and take a hot bath.As soon as you finish bathing throw open all the windows and stand in the draft."

　　“回家洗個熱水澡吧。你一洗完澡就把所有韻窗戶都開啟，然後站在通風處。”

　　"But doc,"protested the patient,

　　這名病人抗議說：“但是醫生，

　　"if I do that,I'll get pneumonia."

　　如果我那麼做的話，我就會得到肺炎呀。”

　　"I know,"said the doctor,"don't worry,I can cure pneumonia."

　　醫生說：“我知道啦，別擔心啦，我會治療肺炎啦。”