有趣的英語笑話

　　笑話作為民間俗文學的一種重要體裁,具有深厚的民族文化內涵。下面是小編帶來的，歡迎閱讀!

　　篇一

　　優質服務

　　Department一store automatic answering machine:

　　百貨公司自動答覆機:

　　"If you are calling to order or send money, press 5.”

　　“如果您想定貨或者付定金請按5。”

　　"If you are calling to register a complaint, press 645954145452772.”

　　“如果您想登記投訴請按645954145452772”

　　"Have a good day.”

　　“祝您愉快。”

　　篇二

　　數學沒及

　　My son，who made the dean’s list in his freshman year at Ball State University in Muncie, Indiana, called home a few weeks after starting his sophomore year as a psychology student.

　　我兒子是印第安那市曼西爾波州立大學的學生，大學一年級就上了系主任的表揚名單。第二年他學心理學，剛幾個星期他就給家裡打了個電話。

　　"Mom,” he said excitedly, "I have found the answer to surviving college 1 It isn't the grades that are so important , but the quality of what is learned and how it is applied to daily life. I’m lucky to be having these wonderful experiences!”

　　“媽媽，”他激動地說:“我找到了如何在大學裡生存下去的答案!重要的不是分數，而是具備將學到的知識應用於日常生活的素質。我很幸運地有了這種奇妙的經歷。”

　　"And just what does this mean?" I asked.

　　“你到底是什麼意思?”我問道。

　　"I' m flunking math.” he replied.

　　“我數學沒及格。”他回答說。

　　篇三

　　提升***中英***

　　Our son, Chris，is a premed student at Georgia Southern University in Statesboro. He is fortunate to have a job in the research lab, where they are studying Lyme disease. Recently he called home and told us that he had received a promotion. "Great!” I said. "You can always use more money.”

　　我們的兒子克里斯是位於斯泰茲波羅的南佐治亞醫科大學的預科生。他很幸運地在研究淋巴疾病的科研室找到了一份工作。最近，他給家裡打電話，告訴我們他得到了提升。“太好了!”我說。“你可以多花一些錢了。”

　　There was a slight pause before Chris responded，"Well，I didn’t exactly get more money. But they did give me more keys.”

　　克里斯停頓了一會兒，才回答說:“嗯，準確地說我倒沒有多拿錢。但是他們確實多給了我幾把鑰匙。”

　　篇四

　　你是哪一個?***中英***

　　My two sisters and I were all away at various colleges at the same time. One day，after facing one crisis too many and tired of being treated like just another undergraduate, I phoned home for some consolation and understanding of my unique problems.

　　我和兩個妹妹同時離開家去不同的大學讀書。經歷了太多的危機，也厭倦了受到與其他大學生相同的對待之後，有一天我給家裡打了個電話，就我獨有的問題尋求安慰和理解。

　　When my dad answered，I immediately launched into my litany of frustrations with college life. As 1 paused to catch my breath, he said，"O. K.，honey. . . now, first of all，who is this?"

　　爸爸接起電話後，我立刻開始歷數我大學生活中的挫折。當我停下來歇口氣時，爸爸說:“好啦，親愛的……現在，首先告訴我，你是哪一個?”

　　篇五

　　新年決心書***中英***

　　Hoping to excite student interest in our reading center, I asked each teacher to write a New Year's resolution on a special form and send it to me. After I posted the resolutions on the bulletin board in the reading center, one young teacher stopped by, looked at them for a few minutes，and then left abruptly. Passing two teachers on their way in , she stormed，"My resolution isn’t posted一and mine was one of the first ones in!”I couldn’t help but overhear, and the tone of her voice sent me flying to my desk in search of a misplaced resolution. Looking rapidly through stacks of papers，I uncovered hers. It read, "I resolve not to let little things upset me.

　　為了激勵同學們對我們閱覽中心的興趣，我請每位老師在一張特製的表格上寫一篇新年決心書交給我。我將決心書張貼在閱覽中心的布告牌上之後，一位年輕老師停下來幾分鐘，便走過來。她越過兩位老師闖了進來，大發雷霆道:“我的決心書竟然沒有貼出來—而我的決心書是第一批交上來的。”我在旁邊聽到了，看她氣勢洶洶的樣子，我嚇得趕緊跑回辦公室去找那份放錯了地方的決心書。飛快瀏覽了幾疊紙之後，我打開了她的那一份，上面寫著:我決心不再為一些小事而煩惱。