幽默英語笑話附翻譯

　　笑話使人們在刻板的生活中感到一絲快意和放鬆，在人們的日常生活中起著重要調劑作用。下面小編為大家帶來，歡迎大家閱讀!

　　1：

　　The farmer was painting the inside of his outhouse

　　一位農夫正在漆他茅房內的牆壁，

　　when he slipped on the seat and fell into the hole beneath.

　　一不小心由所坐的椅子上滑了一跤，跌落到下面的茅坑內。

　　"Fire! Fire! Fire!" he yelled.

　　“失火了!失火了!失火了!”他叫道。

　　Shortly, the fire department arrived and one of the firemen leaned down and asked the farmer,

　　不久消防隊趕來了，一位消防人員彎下身來問

　　"Where's the fire?"

　　“哪裡失火了呢?”

　　"There ain't no fire," said the farmer,

　　“事實上並未失火，”農夫說，“但若是我喊“大便喔!大便喔!你們會趕來嗎?”

　　"but would you have come if I'd yelled,Shit! Shit! Shit ! ? "'

　　2：

　　Mr. Robinson had to travel somewhere on business，and as he was in a hum, he decided to travel by plane. He liked a window seat when he was flying, so when he got on to the plane, and looked for a window seat. He found all of them had already been taken except for one, and a soldier sat beside the empty seat. Mr. Robinson was surprised that the soldier had not taken the one by the windows but, anyway, he at once went towards it.

　　由於生意方面的事，洛賓遜先生得出趟門。因為事情有點急，他決定乘坐飛機。乘機旅行時，他喜歡靠窗戶坐，因此一登上飛機，他就尋找一個靠窗戶的位子。他發現只有一個靠窗戶的座位還空著。在那空座位的旁邊坐著一名士兵。令洛賓遜先生納悶的是，這位士兵沒有坐在靠窗的位置。洛賓遜先生不管那些，他馬上徑直朝那個空座位走去。

　　When he reached it, however, he saw that there was notice on it. It was written in ink and said: "this seat is preserved for load balance, thank you.” Mr. Robinson had never seen such an unusual notice in a plane before, but he thought that the plane must have been carrying something particularly heavy in it, so he walked on and found another empty seat，not beside a window, to sit in.

　　然而，當他到了那兒，他看見座位上有個啟事，是用鋼筆寫的:“為保持裝載平衡，特預訂該位置，謝謝合作。”洛賓遜先生還從未在飛機上見過如此不同尋常的啟事，不過，他想飛機上一定裝載了特別重的物品，於是他找了個不靠窗戶的座位。

　　Two or three people tried to sit in the window seat beside the soldier, but they too read the notice and went on，When the plane was nearly full，a very beautiful girl hurried into the plane. The soldier, who was watching the passengers coming in，quickly took the notice off the seat beside him and in this way succeeded in having the company of the girl during the whole trip.

　　又有兩三位乘客試圖坐在那個士兵旁邊靠窗的座位上，他們那則啟事後，就走開了。當快滿艙時，一位非常美麗的姑娘匆匆地走進機艙。一直在注意進艙乘客的那個士兵，趕緊拿掉他旁邊空座位上的啟事。士兵用這種方法，成功地找到了一位姑娘一路做伴。