英語幽默故事帶翻譯

  民間笑話是一種頗受人們喜愛的民間敘事型別,材料豐富,有廣泛的現實基礎。小編精心收集了,供大家欣賞學習!

  篇1

  寶貝待售

  A New Mum took her baby daughter to the supermarket for the first time.

  一個年輕的媽媽頭一回帶著她的寶貝女兒到超市買東西,

  She dressed her in pink from head to toe.

  她把小寶貝從頭到腳穿上粉紅色的衣服。

  At the store, she placed her in the shopping cart and put her purchases around her.

  在商場,她把小女孩放在購物車裡,把買來的東西都推在孩子周圍。

  At the checkout line a small boy and his mother were ahead of them.

  在付款臺前排隊時,一個小男孩和他媽媽正好排在她們前面。

  The child was crying and begging for some special treat.

  那個小男孩在哭,看上去在向他媽要著什麼東西,年輕的媽媽想,

  He wants some candy or gumand his mother won't let him have any, she thought.

  這個小孩一定是要糖果或是口香糖之類的玩意兒,而他媽媽又不給,所以才鬧得這麼厲害。

  Then she heard his mother's reply.

  然而就在這個時候,她聽到男孩的媽媽一邊回答說,

  "No!"she said, looking in her direction.

  “不行,”一邊往她的方向看過來,

  "You may not have a baby sister today. That lady got the last one"

  “你今天不能買一個小妹妹了,那位女士把最後一個買走了!”

  篇2

  重量事宜

  Somewhat sceptical of his son's newfound determination to become Charles Atlas, the fathernevertheless followed the teenager over to the weight-lifting department, admiring a set ofweights.

  兒子最近決心要成為Charles Atlas,對於這個決定,父親多少有點懷疑,不過他還是陪著兒子去了舉重器材商店,在那裡他們看上了一套舉重器材。

  "Please, Dad," pleaded the boy, "I promise I'll use 'em every day.""I don't know, Michael.

  “哦,爸爸,給我買一套吧,”兒子企求道,“我答應我一定每天都會用它們來練習的。”

  It's really a commitment on your part," the father pointed out."Please, Dad?" the boycontinued.

  “我也不知道,Michael。這對你來說的確是一項承諾,”父親對兒子指出這一點。

  "They're not cheap either," the father came back.

  “好不好嘛,爸爸?”男孩繼續央告。“而且這套器材可不便宜。”父親又說。

  "I'll use 'em Dad, I promise. You'll see.

  “我真的會天天練的,爸爸,我答應你。你會看到的。”

  "Finally won over, the father paid for the equipment and headed for the door.From the corner ofthe store he heard his son yelp, "What! You mean I have to carry them to the car?"

  最後,父親被說服了,他買了這套裝置,然後向門外走去。就在這個時候,他聽到兒子在商店角落裡尖叫著嚷道,“什麼!你的意思是我得一個人把這些東西扛到車上去?”

  篇3

  再活40年

  A middle aged woman had a heart attack and was taken to the hospital.

  一名中年婦女心臟病突發被送到了醫院,

  While on the operating table she had a near death experience.

  在手術檯上,瀕臨死亡之際,

  Seeing God, she asked if this was it.

  她看到了上帝, 於是,她問上帝是不是她的日子到頭了。

  God said, "No you have another 43 years, 2 months, and 8 days to live."

  上帝回答說,“還沒有,你還能活43年,2個月零8天。”

  Upon recovery the woman decided to stay in the hospital and have a face lift, lip-suction,breast augmentation, tummy tuck, etc. She even had someone come in and change her haircolor, figuring since she had so much more time to live, she might as well make the most of it.

  身體快要康復的時候,這名女士想到自己還要活那麼多年,得好好對待自己,於是決定先不出院,而是去給自己整整容,吸吸脂,隆隆胸,然後還做了一個腹部拉皮和其它一些美容美體手術。她甚至還請人到醫院裡面幫她頭髮給染了。

  She got out of the hospital after the last operation and while crossing the street was killed byan ambulance speeding to the hospital.

  做完最後一個手術,這位女士出院了, 但就在過馬路的時候,她被一輛風馳電摯趕回醫院的救護車給撞死了。

  Arriving in front of God, she demanded, "I thought you said I had another 40 Years?

  再一次,她又站到了上帝的面前,她大惑不解地問上帝,“我記得你說我還能再活40年?”

  "God replied, "I didn't recognize you."

  上帝回答,“那個時候我沒認出你來”。