關於三年級簡單英語笑話

　　笑話一般指短小、滑稽的故事,是一種民間口頭創作形式,在民間文化中以口口相傳的形式傳播。小編精心收集了，供大家欣賞學習!

　　：Talking on the Telephone

　　Each Sunday the minister called the children to the front of the church while he told them a story. Once he brought a telephone to better illustrate the idea of prayer.

　　"You talk to people on the telephone and don't see them on the other end of the line, right?" he began. The children nodded yes. "Well, talking to God is

　　like talking on the telephone. He's on the other end, but you can't see him. He is listening though."

　　Just then a little boy piped up and asked, "What's his number?"

　　在電話中交談

　　每個星期天牧師都會把孩子們叫到教堂前面，然後給他們講一個故事。一天，他為了更好地闡述祈禱的含義，帶來了一臺電話機。

　　“你們和別人在電話裡交談，並沒有看到電話線另一端的人，對嗎?”他開始問道。孩子們點頭稱是。“好的，和上帝交談就象通過電話交談一樣。他就在另一端，雖然你看不見他，但是他正在聆聽你的心聲。”

　　就在這時，一個小男孩尖著嗓子問道：“那他的電話號碼是什麼?”

　　：Psychological Test 心理學測試

　　The psychology instructor had just finished a lecture on mental health and was giving an oral test.

　　一位剛剛做完一場有關心理健康講座的心理學指導老師，正在進行一個口頭測試。

　　Speaking specifically about manic depression, she asked, "How would you diagnose a patient who walks back and forth screaming at the top of his lungs one minute, then sits in a chair weeping uncontrollably the next?"

　　測試主題定為躁狂抑鬱症，她問道：“你將怎樣診斷這樣的一個病人，他先是來回走著並大聲叫喊了一分鐘，然後坐在一張椅子上失控般地哭泣。”

　　A young man in the rear raised his hand and answered, "A basketball coach?"

　　一個坐在後面的年輕人舉手答道：“他是一個籃球教練?”

　　：Penguins Go to the Zoo

　　Penguins Go to the Zoo

　　A man drives to a gas station and has his tank filled up. The gas pumper spots two penguins sitting in the back seat of the car.

　　He asks the driver, "What's up with the penguins in the back seat?"

　　The man in the car says "I found them. I asked myself what to do with them, but I haven't had a clue."

　　The clerk ponders a bit then says, "You should take them to the zoo."

　　"Hey, that's a good idea," says the man in the car and drives away.

　　The next day the man with the car is back at the same gas station. The clerk sees the penguins are still in the back seat of the car.

　　"Hey, they're still here! I thought you were going to take them to the zoo."

　　"Oh, I did," says the driver, "And we had a swell time. Today I am taking them to the beach."

　　：He's just been to the zoo

　　A woman was waiting in a line at the bank.She was holding her little son in her arms. The little boy was only two years old. He was eating a roll quietly.

　　Finally the woman came to one of the windows of the iron railings. The little boy looked carefully at the clerk behind the railings. He then laughed happily and gave the roll to the clerk.

　　The clerk smiled and shook his head.

　　"Oh,no, darling,you can't do that here,"said the mother ,and then she turned to the clerk ,"Please forgive my son--he's just been to the zoo."

　　：To Absent Brothers

　　An Irishman walks into a bar in Dublin, orders three pints of Guinness and sits in the back of the room, drinking a sip out of each one in turn.

　　When he finished all three, he comes back to the bar and orders three more. The bartender says to him, 'You know, a pint goes flat after I draw it; it would taste better if you bought one at a time.

　　' The Irishman replies, 'Well, you see, I have two brothers. One is in America, the other in Australia, and I'm here in Dublin. When we all left home, we promised that we'd drink this way to remember the days we all drank together. 'The bartender admits that this is a nice custom, and leaves it there.

　　The Irishman becomes a regular in the bar and always drinks the same way: he orders three pints and drinks the three pints by taking drinks from each of them in turn. One day, he comes in and orders two pints. All the other regulars in the bar notice and fall silent.

　　When he comes back to the bar for the second round, the bartender says, 'I don't want to intrude on your grief, but I wanted to offer my condolences on your great loss.' The Irishman looks confused for a moment, then a lights dawns in his eye and he laughs.

　　'Oh, no, ' he says, 'Everyone is fine. I've just quit drinking!