關於八年級英語笑話精選

　　冷笑話是近幾年新興的一種語言現象,它輕鬆詼諧、別具一格,給我們緊張的生活增添了幾分輕鬆的情趣,它一出現便受到了大多數人的喜愛。本文是關於八年級英語笑話，希望對大家有幫助!

　　關於八年級英語笑話：Photo 我老婆的照片

　　A businessman enters a tavern, sits down at the bar, and orders a double martini on the rocks. After he finishes the drink, he peeks inside his shirt pocket, and then orders the bartender to prepare another double martini. After he finishes that, he again peeks inside his shirt pocket and orders the bartender to bring another double martini. The bartender says, "Look, buddy, I'll bring ya' martinis all night long - but you gotta tell me why you look inside your shirt pocket before you order a refill." The customer replies, "I'm peeking at a photo of my wife. When she starts to look good, I know it's time to go home."

　　一個生意人走進一家酒館，在吧檯坐下，點了一杯加冰的雙料martini。喝完，那生意人往自己襯衣的口袋裡瞥了一眼，然後又讓服務員把杯子滿上。喝完，生意人又往自己襯衣的口袋裡瞥了一眼，然後又讓服務生幫他把杯子滿上。這時酒館的服務生說話了，“呃，老兄，我整個晚上給你倒martini都沒有問題，但你得告訴我，你為什麼在點下一杯酒前都要往自己襯衣的口袋裡偷偷看那麼一眼”。生意人回答，“我看的是我老婆的一張照片。如果照片上的人開始變得好看起來，那就說明我喝得差不多了，該回家了。”

　　關於八年級英語笑話：Problem with gas放屁的問題

　　A little old lady goes to the doctor ... and says, "Doctor, I have this problem with gas, but it doesn't really bother me too much. They never smell and are always silent. As a matter of fact, I've farted at least 20 times since I've been here in your office. You didn't know I was farting because they don't smell and are silent." The doctor says, "I see. Here's a prescription. Take these pills 3 times a day for seven days and come back to see me next week." The next week the lady goes back. "Doctor," she says, "I don't know what the hell you gave me, but now my farts ... although still silent... stink terribly." The doctor says, "Good! Now that we've cleared up your sinuses, let's start working on your hearing."

　　有位小老太太去看醫生：“醫生，我有愛放屁的毛病。其實也不是大問題，只是我放屁不臭而且沒聲音。事實上，我在這裡已經放了20多個屁，但是你並不知道對吧，因為我的屁不臭，而且還沒聲音。”醫生說：“好的，我明白了。吃這個藥片，一天三次連續吃七天，下星期你再來。”一星期後老太太來了，“醫生，你到底給的我什麼藥，現在我放屁還是沒聲音，但是怎麼這麼臭!”醫生說：“太好了!你的嗅覺正常了，現在開始治聽覺。”

　　關於八年級英語笑話：I Lost 我輸了

　　It was at a five o’clock tea. A young man came to the hostess to apologize for his lateness.

　　“So good of you to come， Mr.Jones，and where is your brother?”

　　“You see we're very busy in the office and only one of us could come，so we tossed up for it.”

　　“How nice!And so original， too! And you won?”

　　“No，” said the young man absently，“I lost.”

　　五點鐘，下午茶的時間，一個年輕人因為遲到向女主人致歉。

　　“您能來可真好，瓊斯先生，您的兄弟在哪兒呢?”

　　“您知道我們在辦公室裡有非常忙，我們倆只能來一個，所以就擲幣來決定由誰來。”

　　“太有意思了!還那麼有獨創性!那您贏了?”

　　“不，”年輕人心不在焉地說，“我輸了。”

　　關於八年級英語笑話：Psychiatrist 精神病醫生

　　Jerry went to a psychiatrist. "Doc," he said, "I've got trouble. Every time I get into bed, I think there's somebody under it. I'm going crazy!" Just put yourself in my hands for one year," said the shrink. "Come to me three times a week, and I'll cure your fears." How much do you charge?" A hundred dollars per visit." I'll sleep on it," said Jerry. Six months later the doctor met Jerry on the street. "Why didn't you ever come to see me again?" asked the psychiatrist. For a hundred bucks a visit? The bartender cured me for $10." "Is that so! How?" He told me to cut the legs off the bed!" Ain't nobody under there now!!!

　　傑瑞去看精神病醫生。“醫生，我有些不對勁。每次睡覺的時候，我都感覺有人在床下。我要瘋了!”“給我一年時間，”醫生說，“每週來三次，我會治好你。”“費用是多少呢?”“每次一百美元。”“我會認真考慮的。”傑瑞答道。六個月後醫生和傑瑞在街上相遇了，“為什麼你再也沒來呢?”醫生問。“一次一百塊錢嗎?有個酒吧服務生收了十塊錢就把我治好了。”“真的?他怎麼做到的?”“他讓我把床腿鋸掉。現在那沒人了!”

　　關於八年級英語笑話：A beggar

　　A young man who did not have much money was coming home by train one day. He gave his last few coins to a beggar***乞丐***, but then he saw another one ,and forgot that he didn’t have any money about him . He asked the beggar if he’d like to have lunch with him , and the beggar agreed .

　　So they went into a small restaurant and had a good meal . At the end the man could not pay the bill . Of course the beggar had to do so .

　　The young man was very sorry about this , so he said to the beggar , “Come home with me in a taxi , my friend, and I’ll give you back the money for lunch.” “Oh, no !” the beggar answered quickly . “I had to pay for your taxi too!”