關於英語小笑話演講短文

　　笑話是一種用來逗笑取樂的文體。笑話,不僅能讓同學們在日常生活和學習中不時地會心一笑,還能從中學習到不少的英語知識。小編精心收集了，供大家欣賞學習!

　　篇1

　　催單

　　In the veterinary office where I’m a technician，we mail out reminders when pets are due for vaccinations. Bruno，a German shepherd，arrived for his annual rabies shot，and we were required by state law to ask his owner if Bruno had bitten anyone in the last ten days."Oh yes，in fact that’s why we’re here，”she replied.Surprised，I told her we assumed they'd come in because of our reminder.

　　我是一家獸醫站的技師。當動物到了該注射疫苗的時候，洲門就寄出催單。一條德國牧羊犬布獸諾來做每年一次的狂犬疫苗注射。我們依照州法律的要求詢問他的主人，在過去的十天里布魯諾是否咬了什麼人。“噢，是的。事實上這正是我們到這兒來的原因，”她回答說。我覺得奇怪，告訴她我們以為他們是因為收到了我們的催單才來的。

　　"We did，”she explained.“Bruno bit the mail carrier who was delivering your card.”

　　“的確如此，”她解釋道。“布獸諾咬了給你們送催單的郵遞員。”

　　篇2

　　這孩子可以待在這裡

　　One afternoon while I was talking to a professor,my two-year-old daughter, Lily wandered into a nearby classroom. There was a math class in progress and，to my dismay，Lily sat down in the front row.

　　一天下午，當我和一位教授談話時，我兩歲的女兒莉莉走進了旁邊的一間教室。教室正在上數學課，使我驚愕的是，莉莉進去在第一排坐下了。

　　When I went in to get her, the instructor stopped me. "Young lady，”he said，“I have been teaching calculus at this college for over 20 years. In that time，not once has anyone come to my class just he or she wanted to. The child may stay.”’

　　當我進去想把她弄出來時，講課的教師攔住了我。“夫人，”他說，“我在這所大學裡教微積分已經二+幾年了。在這段時間裡從沒有人自願來聽我的課。讓孩子待在這吧。”

　　篇3

　　方法和手段

　　Working at a college with a preponderance of non一English一speaking students，my sister sometimes had difficulty in communicating with the newly arrived. Once as she was enrolling a young man，she reached a standstill at the question of birth date. No matter what words or motions she used，the young man remained puzzled. Finally，a Chinese student standing nearby asked my sister，"What do you need to know?”After my sister explained，the Chinese woman turned to the young man and hummed the first few bars of“Happy Birthday to You”.

　　我妹妹在一所大多數學生都不會講英文的大學裡任教。她有時在與新生交談時感到困難。有一次，她還在給一位新來的小夥子註冊，她在問他的生日是哪天的時候，遇到了不可逾越的困難。無論她用什麼詞句或什麼手勢，這位年輕人不明白她的意思。後來，一位站在旁邊的中國女學生問我妹妹:“您想要知道什麼?”我妹妹向她解釋後，這位中國女學生轉向小夥子，嘴裡哼起了“祝你生日快樂”歌的頭幾小節。

　　His eyes lit up in recognition as he explained，“May 12，1978.”The helpful student shrugged and said，"Same song，every country."

　　他眼裡頓時流露出懂了的意思，說道:"1978年5月12日。”那位樂於助人的女學生聳聳肩說:“每個國家都唱這同一首歌。”