英語小笑話一分多鐘
笑話,是供人們消遣或交際的一種創造性的語言形式,其主要功能是調侃、娛樂或諷刺。小編精心收集了一分多鐘的英語小笑話,供大家欣賞學習!
一分多鐘的英語小笑話篇1
My cooking has always been the target of family jokes. One evening, as I prepared dinner a bittoo quickly, the kitchen filled with smoke and the smoke detector went off. Although both ofmy children had received fire-safety training at school, they did not respond to the alarm.Annoyed, I stormed through the house in search of them.
I found them in the bathroom, washing their hands. Over the loud buzzing of the smokealarm, I asked them to identify the sound.
"It's the smoke detector," they replied in unison.
"Do you know what that sound means?" I demanded.
"Sure," my oldest replied. "Dinner's ready."
我的燒飯手藝向來是家庭笑話的攻擊目標。一天晚上,晚餐我準備得有點兒太快了,廚房裡充滿了煙,結果煙霧探查器報起警來。儘管我的兩個孩子都在學校裡接受過防火安全訓練,可是他們並沒有對報警聲作出反應。我感到很惱火,滿幢房子亂衝尋找他們。
我在洗漱間找到他們,發現他們正在洗手。我的聲音蓋過了煙霧警報的嗡嗡聲,我叫他們辨別那聲音。
“是煙霧探查器,”他們異口同聲地說。
“你們知道那聲音意味著什麼嗎?”我責問道。
“當然,”我的大孩子回答道,“晚飯準備好了。”
一分多鐘的英語小笑話篇2
At the supermarket I noticed an elderly man who seemed to be following me wherever I went.As I moved to each aisle, there he was, smiling at me. Now I was wondering if he wasinterested in me. At the dairy counter I was checking out the eggs when I felt a tap on myshoulder. Turning around, I saw that it was the same man. "Lady," he finally said, "you havemy shopping cart."
在超市我注意到一位上了年紀的男子好像總在跟著我。我每到一個售貨通道,他就跟我到一個售貨通道,微笑地看著我。我開始想他是不是喜歡上我了。在乳品櫃,我正給雞蛋包裝結賬時,有人在我肩上輕拍了一下。我轉過身發現還是那個男子。“女士,”他終於開口說話了,“你用著我的購物車呢。”
一分多鐘的英語小笑話篇3
Matt and his wife lived in the country. Matt was very stingy and hated spending money. Oneday a fair came to the nearby town.
"Let's go to the fair, Matt," his wife said. "We haven't been anywhere for a long time."
Matt thought about this for a while. He knew he would have to spend money at the fair. Atlast he said, "All right, but I'm not going to spend much money. We'll look at things, but wewon't buy anything. "
They went to the fair and looked at all the things to buy. There were many things Matt'swife wanted to buy, but he would not let her spend any money.
Then, in a nearby field, they saw a small airplane.
"Fun flights!" the notice said, " $ 10 for 10 minutes.
Matt had never been in an airplane and he wanted to go on a fun flight. However, he didn'twant to have to pay for his wife, as well.
"I've only got $ 10, " he told the pilot. "Can my wife come with me for free?" The pilotwasn't selling many tickets, so he said, "I'll make a bargain with you. If your wife doesn'tscream or shout, she can have a free flight."
Matt agreed, and got into the small airplane with his wife.
The pilot took off and made his airplane do all kinds of things. At one moment it was flyingupside down.
When the plane landed, the pilot said, "0. K. your wife didn't make a sound. She can haveher ride free."
"Thank you," Matt said. "It wasn't easy for her, you know, especially when she fell out."
麥特和妻子住在鄉下。麥特很吝嗇,討厭花錢。一天附近的鎮子逢集。
“我們去趕集,麥特,”妻子說。“我們很久沒出去了。”
麥特想了一會兒。他知道在集市上一定得花錢。最後他說:“好吧,但我不打算花太多錢。我們只看不買。”
他們去集市,看看所有可買的東西。有很多東西麥特的妻子想買,但麥特不讓她買。
然後在附近的露天場地,他們看到一架小飛機。
“有趣的飛行。”海報上寫著,“10分鐘10美元。”
麥特從來沒有乘過飛機,所以他想乘一次小飛機。然而他不想付他妻子的票錢。
“我只帶了10美元,”他對飛機駕駛員說,“我妻子能免費和我一起乘飛機嗎?”駕駛員沒賣出多少票,所以他說:“我和你做個交易。如果你妻子不尖叫,也不叫出聲來,她就能免費飛行。”
麥特同意了,他和妻子一起登上了飛機。
飛機起飛了,駕駛員讓飛機做出各種各樣的動作。有一會兒飛機倒著飛行。
飛機著陸時,駕駛員說,“好吧,你妻子沒發出任何聲響。她就不用買飛機票了。”
“謝謝,”麥特說,“你知道,這對她不容易,特別當她剛才掉下去的時候。”