關於短的英語笑話閱讀
笑話是一種頗受人們喜愛的民間敘事型別,材料豐富,有廣泛的現實基礎。但長期以來它卻一直被學界視為不登大雅之堂的小眾,致使研究成果相對薄弱。下面是小編帶來的，歡迎閱讀!
篇一
You forget again 你又忘了
An 80-year-old couple were having problems remembering things, so they decided1 to go to their doctor to get checked out to make sure nothing was wrong with them.
After checking the couple out, the doctor told them they were physically2 okay but might want to start writing all the things down and make notes to help them remember things. The couple thanked the doctor and left .
Later that night while watching TV, the old man got up from his chair and his wife asked, "where are you going?" he replied, "To the kitchen." she asked, "Will you get a bowl of ice cream?" He replied, "Sure." She then asked him, "Don't you think you should write it down so you can remember it?" He said "No, I can remember that." She then said, "Well, I also would like some strawberries on top. You had better write that down because I know you'll forget that." He said, "I can remember that, you want a bowl of ice cream with strawberries." She replied, "Well, I also would like whip cream on top, I know you will forget that so you'd better write it down." Withirritation3 in his voice, he said, "I don't need to write that down, I can remember that," He thenfumed4 into the kitchen. After about 30 minutes he returned from the kitchen and handed her a plate of bacon and eggs. She stared at the plate for a moment and said, "You forget my toast."
一對八十歲的老夫婦記性不好，於是決定到醫生那裡檢查，擔心哪裡有什麼毛病。
醫生檢查完後告訴他們體檢正常，只是為了幫助記憶，他們可以把想做的事用筆記下來。老夫婦謝過醫生後就回家了。
晚上看著看著電視，老頭站起身來，老太太問：“你去哪兒啊?”老頭回答：“去廚房。”老太太接著問：“帶一盤冰激凌來，好嗎?”老頭說：“沒問題。”老太太說：“難道不用寫下來?這樣你就不會忘記了?”老頭說：“不用了，我記得住。”老太太又說：“那好，我還想在冰激凌上放點草莓。你最好記下來，我想你記不住的。”老頭回答：“忘不了，你要的是一盤草莓冰激凌。”老太太還說：“我還想在頂上再放點奶油，我知道你記不住，還是寫下來吧。”老頭有點兒煩了，說：“用不著寫，我能記住。”老頭氣憤地走進廚房。大概過了三十分鐘，老頭回來遞給老伴一盤燻肉和雞蛋。老太太盯著盤子看了一會兒說：“你忘了拿烤麵包。”
篇二
吾欲與狗試比高
A man went to visit a friend and was amazed to find him playing chess with his dog.
He watched the game in astonishment1 for a while.
"I can hardly believe my eyes!" he exclaimed. "That's the smartest dog I've ever seen."
"Nah, he's not so smart," the friend replied. "I've beaten him three games out of five."
某人去朋友家拜訪，發現朋友竟然在跟自家的狗下象棋，大為錯愕。
他旁觀了一會兒，當時就震驚了。
“我簡直不敢相信!”他大叫，“我從沒見過那麼聰明的狗!”
“哪裡聰明瞭，”朋友回答，“五局中我贏了三局呢!”
篇三
That chicken was delicious 那隻雞實在是美味啊
There was a little old lady who was nearly blind, and she had three sons who wanted to prove which one was the best to her.
Son 1 bought her a 15-room mansion1, thinking this would surely be the best that any of them could offer her.
Son 2 bought her a beautiful Mercedes with a chauffeur2***司機*** included, thinking this would surely win her approval.
Son 3 had to do something even better, so he bought her a parrot that he had been training for 15 years to memorize the entire Bible. You could ask the parrot any verse in the Bible, and he could quote it word for word. What a gift that would be.
Well, the old lady went to the first son and said, "Son, the house is just gorgeous, but it's really much too big for me. I only live in one room, and it's too large to clean and take care of. I really don't need the house, but thank you anyway." Then she confronted her second son with, "Son, the car is beautiful. It has everything you could ever want on it, but I don't drive and really don't like the chauffeur, so please return the car."
Next, she went to Son 3 and said, "Son, I just want to thank you for your most thoughtful gift. That chicken was delicious."
從前有一個近乎失明的小老太，她有三個兒子，每一個都想向母親證明自己對她最好。
第一個兒子為她買下一棟有15個房間的大屋，他覺得這是對母親最好的孝順方式，其他兄弟都比不上。
二兒子為她買了一輛漂亮的賓士，還配了個司機。他也覺得他一定會贏了。
老三為母親買了一隻鸚鵡。這隻鸚鵡接受了15年的訓練，能一字不落地背誦整部聖經，並且不論你問他什麼，他都能從聖經裡原句引出。
這位老太太對他的第一個兒子說：“孩子，你買的房子很棒。但是它太大了，我只能睡一間屋，還要花時間去 打理剩下的房間，謝謝你，但我實在不需要它。”接著她對二兒子說：“你的車也很好，再不能找到比那更棒的車了，但我不會開車，也不喜歡那個司機，所以你把它拿去推了吧!”
最後，她對她的小兒子說：“孩子，我要感謝你最棒的禮物!那隻雞實在是美味啊!”