英語四級寫作經典範文和點評

  下面是小編整理的,希望對大家有幫助。

  現代生活節奏緊張,忙碌使許多人感到疲憊不堪,但忙碌對生活卻有著十分重要的意義。孰不聞“勤能補拙”,孰不知“業精於勤”,“勤有三益”?

  Importance of Being Busy

  Sometimes life becomes so busy that you feel as if you are the only person to whom the whole world has been merciless and that you are the only person who is working harder than anyone else. Yes, the grass on the other side of the fence is always greener and fresher.

  However, the more things one has to do or one is into, the greater the involvement in a mental, physical or social way in these things.① Due to this, one’s own personal problems are out of sight, because all the time one’s mind is thinking of completing the undertaken tasks.② Problems, once they are out of sight are out of mind.

  Each thing that we do adds a new dimension to our personality. It shapes our thinking and makes us more organized, experienced, knowledgeable and creative. The time and sweat that we put in everyday into our tasks is the brick and mortar of our future. So friends, it is always better to be busy rather than idle. Now hasn’t everyone heard that an idle mind is the devil’s workshop? Behind every successful man is a devotedly followed busy schedule rather than a woman.

  [200 words]

  行文點評

  文章結構總分總。

  首句使用了so ... that句型,強調現代生活的忙碌程度。第二句用grass作比喻支援了首句。第二段以However開始,筆鋒一轉,指出忙碌使一個人投入到所做的每一件都會對我們有好處,並引用諺語an idle mind is the devil’s workshop,從反面說明閒散的危害。結尾以改編名言的形式畫龍點睛。

  文章短小精煉,正文中沒有出現important或importance等詞,卻將忙碌的重要性論述得合情合理,水到渠成。文章使用比喻、諺語等寫作手法使語言生動活潑,句式多變新穎,如第二段首句使用the more the greater句型,不僅在內容上強調了第3段首可而且在可式上顯得有所變化,避無單一。第三段第二句中則以四個並列的形容詞organized, experienced knowledgeable and creative深化觀點。

  好文妙譯

  忙碌的重要性

  有時候生活變得如此繁忙,以至於你覺得彷彿你是惟一一個世界對你無情的人,而且你是世界上惟一一個比誰工作都辛苦的人。的確,鄰家芳草總是更綠、更新鮮。

  然而,一個人越有事情要做或正在做,他投入到這些事情中的精力、體力和社交就越多。由此,一個人就看不到自己的個人問題了,因為他的心裡總是在想著如何完成承擔的任務。問題一旦眼不見了,心也就不煩了。

  我們做的每件事都會提升我們的人格魅力。它塑造我們的思想,讓我們更具組織性,更有經驗,知識更淵博也更具創造力。我們每天為完成任務所花的時間和所流的汗水就是建築我們未來的一磚一瓦。因此,朋友們,忙碌總比無所事事好。大家不是都聽過“遊手好閒的頭腦就是魔鬼的作坊”這句話嗎?每個成功男人的背後是一張兢兢業業的繁忙的日程表,而不是一個女人。

  詞彙斟酌

  ?mortar n. 砂漿,灰漿

  ?devotedly ad. 忠實的,一心一意的

  ?schedule n. 時間表,進度表,計劃,安排

  ?merciless a. 無慈悲心的,殘忍的

  ?undertake vt. 承擔,擔任,著手作;答應,保證

  ?dimension n. 方面,特點;尺度,深度;面積

  ?creative a. 創造性的,有創造力的

  佳句臨摹

  ①【註釋】the more ... the ...越…越…

  【臨摹】The truth of life is that the more you want the less you get.生活的真諦就是你想要的越多,反而得到的就越少。

  ②【註釋】out of sight看不見了,不讓人看見

  【臨摹】They looked for the cyclist but he was already out of sight.他們找那個騎自行車的人,但是已經看不見他了。

  思如泉湧

  Progress is the activity of today and the assurance of tomorrow.進步是今天的活動,明天的保證。

  Better wear out shoes than sheets.寧可磨破鞋子,也不要蹭破床單;寧奔波健身也不貪睡而得病。