跟英語有關的超搞笑笑話

  隨著中國經濟的發展和與國際社會聯絡日益緊密,中國人對於英語的重視也與日俱增,對於英語學習的狂熱程度愈發高漲。下面是小編帶來的,歡迎閱讀!

  篇一

  Caught stealing 預算超標的小偷

  A shoplifter***商店扒手*** was caught red-handed trying to steal a watch from a jewelrystore. "Listen," said the shoplifter, "I know you don't want any trouble either. What do you say I just buy the watch, and we forget about this?"

  The manager agreed and wrote up the sales slip. The crook***騙子,壞蛋*** looked at the slip and said, "This is a little more than I intended to spend."

  一個小偷在一家珠寶店企圖偷走一隻手錶的時候被當場擒獲。“聽著,”小偷說,“我知道你們也不想惹麻煩。我把這隻表買下,然後我們就當什麼也沒發生,你看怎樣?”

  經理表示同意,然後列了一張售貨單。小偷看著單子說道:“這比我最初的預算稍稍高了一點,你們還有沒有便宜一點兒東西。"

  篇二

  Warning 提醒

  Several weeks after our son began his freshman year at Alma College in Michigan, my husband and I decided to visit him. I was careful to call him a few days in advance to "warn" him that we would be coming. When we arrived at the dorm, however, I was taken aback by thedisarray of his room. "Forgot we were coming, didn't you?" I teased.

  "Are you kidding?" he replied, "Why else would I have bothered to clean?"

  我們的兒子是密歇根州阿爾馬大學的新生,開學幾個星期之後,我和丈夫決定去看看他。我特意提前給他打電話,“提醒”他我們將光臨。但是當我們來到宿舍時,他的房間凌亂不堪,我非常吃驚。“忘了我們要來,是吧?”我取笑他。

  “開什麼玩笑?”,他回答說,“要不我憑什麼費神打掃?”

  篇三

  Much Worse 那就更糟了

  Policeman: Why didn't you shout for help when you were robbed of your watch?

  Man: If I had opened my mouth, they'd have found my four gold teeth. That would be much worse.

  警察:有人搶你的手錶時,你為什麼不呼救呢?

  男子:要是我張口的話,他們就會發現我的四顆金牙。那就更糟了。

  篇四

  Money and friends

  A: Which do you find more important, money or friends?

  B: Friends, of course.

  A: Why?

  B: I can always borrow money from friends.

  甲:你認為錢和朋友哪一個更重要?

  乙:當然是朋友。

  甲:為什麼?

  乙:我總可以從朋友那兒借到錢。

  篇五

  Englishman 一個英國人

  Once, late at night, an Englishman came out of his room into the corridor***走廊*** of a hotel and asked the servant to bring him a glass of water. The servant did as he was asked. The Englishman re-entered his room, but a few minutes later he came into the corridor again and once more asked the servant for a glass of water. The servant brought him another glass of water. Every few minutes the Englishmen would come out of his room and repeat his request. After a half-hour the astonished servant decided to ask the Englishman what he was doing with the water. Nothing, the Englishman answered imperturbably***平靜地*** , It’s simply that my room is on fire.

  一天晚上,一個英國人從他住的旅店房間裡走出來。來到走廊上,叫旅店的服務員給他拿一杯水來。服務員按他的要求做了。英國人回到了他的房間裡,幾分鐘後他又來到走廊上,讓服務員再給他送一杯水。服務員又給他送了一杯水。每隔幾分鐘。英國人就走出房間重複他的要求。 半小時之後.這位感到驚訝的服務員決定問問房客要這些水乾什麼,英國人不謊不忙地回答:沒什麼.只不過是我的房間裡起火了。