關於聖誕節英語小笑話

　　一段無傷大雅的笑話,不僅給人帶來歡樂,還會揭示生活真諦。下面是小編帶來的，歡迎閱讀!

　　篇一

　　The thief and the judge

　　It was Christmas and the judge was in a benevolent mood as he questioned the prisoner. "What are you charged with?" he asked。

　　"Doing my christmas shopping early," replied the defendant。

　　"That's no offense," replied the judge, "How early were you doing this shopping?"

　　"Before the store opened," countered the prisoner。

　　法官與小偷

　　那天是聖誕節，法官在審訊犯人時也有點惻隱之心。“你為什麼而被起訴?”他問。

　　“採購聖誕節物品過早。”被告答。

　　“這不算犯法，”法官回答，“你購物多早?”

　　在商店開門之前，“犯人應道。

　　篇二

　　A child on Christmas time asked for some paper and crayons in order to draw a crib. Eventually the artistic masterpiece was displayed for parental approval. The manager, the shepherds, Jesus and Holy Family wore duly admired。

　　"But what's that in the corner?" asked Mother。

　　"Oh, that's their telly," replied the tot。

　　耶穌的電視機

　　聖誕節時孩子要了紙和蠟筆，想畫一張耶穌誕生像。最後這件藝術品被陳列出來供父母鑑賞。

　　他們對耶穌誕生後睡的馬槽，牧羊人，耶穌及其家庭都逐一表示讚賞。

　　“可是那個角落裡是什麼?”媽媽問。

　　“噢，那是他們的電視機，”孩子回答說。

　　篇三

　　What does Santa Claus like to do in his garden?

　　Answer: he likes to hoe, hoe, hoe

　　聖誕老人喜歡在花園裡做什麼?

　　答案：鋤地。***英文裡Hoe 和ho同音。hoe是鋤草之意，ho則是聖誕老人的笑聲。***

　　篇四

　　On Christmas Eve Santa Claus met an honest politician and a kind lawyer while riding up in an elevator of a very exclusive hotel. Just before the doors opened the three of them noticed a 1000NT bill lying on the floor. Which one of them do you think picked it up?

　　Answer: Santa of course! Why? Because everybody knows that the other two don’t exist!

　　聖誕節前夕，聖誕老人和一清廉的政治人物，以及一心地善良的律師在一家高階飯店一同等電梯，門還未開前，三人同時看到地上有一張新臺幣1000元的鈔票，猜猜誰會將它撿起?

　　答案：當然是聖誕老人啦!為什麼?因為大家都知道另外兩者並不存在。

　　篇五

　　A Useful Lesson

　　In England nobody under the age of eighteen is allowed to drink in a public bar.

　　Mr. Thompson used to go to a bar near his house quite often，but he never took his son，Tom，because he was too young. Then when Tom had his eighteenth birthday， Mr.Thompson took him to his usual bar for the first time.They drank for half an hour， and then Mr.Thompson said to his son，“Now， Tom，I want to teach you a useful lesson.You must always be careful not to drink too much. And how do you know when you've had enough? Well， I'll tell you.Do you see those two lights at the end of the bar? When they seem to have become four，you've had enough and should go home.”

　　“But， Dad，” said Tom，“I can only see one light at the end of the bar.”

　　有益的教訓

　　在英國，十八歲以下的人不準進酒吧喝酒。

　　湯普森先生以前常常去他家附近的一個酒吧喝酒，但他從來不帶他的兒子湯姆去，因為他年紀太小。後來，當湯姆年滿十八歲的時候，湯普森先生第一次帶他去他常去的那家酒吧。他們喝了半個小時，而後，湯普森先生對他兒子說：“湯姆，現在我要告訴你一個有益的教訓。你必須時時小心不要喝得太多。你怎麼知道你喝夠了呢?好，我來告訴你。你看見酒吧那頭有兩盞燈嗎?當那兩盞燈看起來變成四盞的時候，你就喝夠了，應該回家了。

　　“可是，爸爸。”湯姆說：“在酒吧那頭我只能看見一盞燈。”