幽默的爆笑英文笑話大全

  民間笑話是一種頗受人們喜愛的民間敘事型別,材料豐富,有廣泛的現實基礎。但是它卻一直被學界視為不登大雅之堂的小眾,研究工作相對薄弱。小編整理了幽默的爆笑英文笑話,歡迎閱讀!

  幽默的爆笑英文笑話:A Whole Hour 整整一小時

  Mr. Brown arrived for work an hour late. His clothes were torn and tattered1. He was banged and bruised2, and he had one arm in a sling3. His boss was purple with rage.

  "It's ten o'clock," screamed the boss, "you were supposed to be here at nine. What happened?"

  "I'm sorry," explained Mr. Brown, "I fell out of ten-story window."

  "That took you a whole hour?"

  布朗先生上班整整遲到了一小時,他衣衫不整,渾身青紫,一隻胳膊上還打著繃帶。他的老闆怒火沖天。

  “現在已經十點了,”老闆咆哮著,“你九點鐘就應該來的。到底發生了什麼事?”

  “對不起,”布朗先生解釋道,“我從10層樓的窗戶裡摔下去了。”

  “難道那也要用整整一個小時嗎?”

  幽默的爆笑英文笑話:死亡訃告

  The phone rang in the obituary department of the local newspaper. "How much does it cost to have an obituaryprinted"? asked the woman.

  地方報社負責刊登死亡訃告的部門電話響了。“登一篇訃告多少錢?”一位女士問。

  "It's five dollars a word, ma'am," the clerk replied politely. "Fine," said the woman after a moment."Got a pencil?" "Yes ma'am." "Got some paper?""Yes ma'am."

  “五美元一個字,太太。”書記員禮貌地回答。“好的,”女士沉默了一小會兒,“拿著筆呢嗎?”“是的,夫人。”“紙呢?”“是的,夫人。”

  "Okay, write this down: 'Cohen dead'." "That's all?" asked the clerk disbelievingly. "That's it." "I'm sorry ma'am, I should have told you - there's a five word minimum."

  “好的,這樣寫:‘科恩去世了’”“就這些了?”書記員疑惑地問道。“對,就這些。”“很抱歉,夫人,我剛才沒有告訴您,在我們這登訃告最少也得五個字。”

  "Yes, you should've," snapped the woman. Now let me think a minute... okay, got a pencil?" "Yes ma'am.""Got some paper?" "Yes, ma'am." "Okay, here goes: 'Cohen dead. Cadillac for Sale.'"

  “沒錯,你就應該告訴我,”女士有點生氣了,“現在我得考慮一下,嗯…拿著筆呢嗎?”“是的,夫人。”“紙呢?”“是的,夫人。”“好的,這樣寫:‘科恩去世了,出售一輛卡迪拉克轎車。’”

  幽默的爆笑英文笑話:沒問題

  A bald man took a seat in a beauty shop.

  一個禿頭的男人坐在理髮店裡。

  "How can I help you?" asked the stylist. "I went for a hair transplant," the guy explained, "but Icouldn't stand the pain.

  髮型師問:“有什麼可以幫你嗎?”那個人解釋說:“我本來要去做頭髮移植,但實在太疼了。

  If you can make my hair look like yours without causing me any discomfort, I'll pay you$5,000."

  如果你能夠讓我的頭髮看起來像你的一樣,而且沒有任何痛苦,我將付給你5000美元。”

  "No problem," said the stylist, and he quickly shaved his head.

  “沒問題,”髮型師說,然後他很快幫自己剃了個光頭。