用英語說的小笑話大全
幽默笑話是一種十分常見的語言現象,在日常生活中,它無處不在,起著十分重要的作用。下面是小編帶來的用英語說的爆笑笑話,歡迎閱讀!
用英語說的爆笑笑話篇一
昂貴的投資
A father had four sons. One went to the big city,where he became a wealthy businessman,the other three remained in their home town. When their father passed away,the successful son was too busy to attend the funeral,but he told his brothers to spare no expense,since he would pay all the costs.
一位父親有四個兒子。一個兒子到了大城市成了一位富商,另外三個兒子留在了家鄉。當父親過世時,有錢的兒子太忙無法前來參加葬禮。但他吩咐其兄弟們,不要捨不得花錢,一切費用由他來支付。
Shortly thereafter,the wealthy son received an bill for $5,000 from the funeral director,which he paid. But every month afterward he got a bill for $27. Curious about this little item, he wrote to his brothers and asked the reason for the monthly charge.”You told us that we should spare no expense,“his brothers wrote back.“Since you said Dad would like to be in style,we rented him a tuxedo."
事隔不久,做富商的兒子從殯儀館主管那兒收到了一張5000美元的發票,他付了帳。從這以後,他每月都收到一張27美元的帳票。他對這筆微薄的開銷有點兒好奇,於是就寫信給其兄弟,想知道其中的原因。
他的兄弟們寫回信告訴他:“你告訴我們不必節省。既然你說爸爸的穿著要高稚脫俗,所以我們為他租了一套黑色禮服。”
用英語說的爆笑笑話篇二
警察的熱心
I was surprised to learn that my 72-year-old mother dared to drive 900 miles in a 12-year-old car to visit me.When asked how she made out,she told me just fine...until her second night. She had filled the gas tank and didn't have the money for a motel room.
當聽說我72歲的母親居然開著12年的舊車行駛了900英里來看我時,我真有些吃驚。在我問她是如何做的時候,她告訴我她一切都好,只是到了第二天晚上,給汽車加油後卻沒有住旅館的錢。
"What did you do?"I asked.
“那你怎麼辦了?”我問道。
" Well,"she began,“I was driving through this small town and feeling very sleepy. A policeman pulled me over and asked if I had been drinking. When I told him no,he wanted to know why I was weaving all over the road,I explained my situation,’‘Follow me,”he ordered.We then drove to a motel where the nice officer paid for my night's lodging.
她說:“嗨,我開到這個鎮子時,感到很困,一位警寨叫住了我。他問我是否喝了酒,我說沒喝。警察問我為什麼開車在路上打晃晃。於是我解釋了我的情況。他命令道:“跟我走。”就這樣,我們就開到了一個汽車旅館。警察替我付了住店費。
"As he was leaving,"Mother continued,”he turned to me and said,I Ma'am,the next time you have to visit your daughter,please take another route.'”
媽媽接著說:“他離開時,轉過身,衝著我說:‘夫人,你下次要看兒女時,請走另一條路線吧!’”
用英語說的爆笑笑話篇三
訓獸童
A boy of about ten was sitting on a city bus with a briefcase on his lap. Periodically the youngster would whisper into his coat. A woman passenger caught his eye with a quizzical look and,in response,the boy produced a small white mouse from his shirt pocket.”He's just a baby."explained the youngster. "His parents are in here. "Opening his briefcase,he brought forth a pair of slightly Larger. white mice from among a dozen or so that scurried around inside. By this time several other passengers had formed an audience, and the boy patiently explained his interest in mice,how to take care of them, their eating habits, their different personalities and so on.
一位十歲的男孩腿上放著會文箱,正坐在一輛城市公共汽車上。這個孩子不斷地對著他衣服小聲嘟嚷。一位女乘客從這個男孩的眼神裡看到一種疑感。緊接著這個小男孩從他的襯衣兜裡拿出一隻小白鼠,並解繹說:“這是個鼠息子。他的父母也在這裡。”開啟他的手提箱,他從大約有十幾個的白鼠中挑出一對稍大的。這時其他的乘客也圍了過來。小男孩耐心地講著他對白鼠的興趣,怎樣照顧它們,它們的飲食習慣及不同的特性。
As the bus pulled up to his stop,the boy slipped the mice back into his briefcase and rose to leave his rapt audience. Starting down the steps,he turned back for a moment.
待車在汽車站停下時,小男孩把小白鼠放回到手提箱,站起來,離開了這些著了迷的觀眾。他下車時轉過身對大家說:“這些是用來餵我助蛇的。”說著,他就消失了。
"They are for my snake. "he said and disappeared out of the door.
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