經典趣味英語笑話

　　下面是小編整理的四則，希望大家喜歡!

　　經典英語笑話：一位了不起的天才

　　"Did you know I could tell time by the piano?" asked one friend of another.

　　“你相信我可以由鋼琴知道現在幾點鐘嗎?’一位老兄向他的朋友問道。

　　"You're kidding," replied his companiondubiously.

　　“別開玩笑了!”他的朋友懷疑地回答。

　　"I'll show you," said the first man as he sat down at the piano and started to hammer out a martial tune.

　　“那我試給你看，”說著那位老兄就坐在鋼琴前開始彈起一首進行曲。

　　Within seconds came a pounding on the wall, and an angry voice shouting,

　　幾秒鐘後牆壁傳來捶打聲，一個憤怒的聲音叫道：

　　"Hey, you son of a bitch, don’t you realize it,s three o’clock in the morning?"

　　“嘿!***的，你知不知道現在是凌晨三點鐘?”

　　經典英語笑話：一個早熟的小孩

　　When the door-to-door salesman rang the doorbell of the suburban home,

　　當挨家挨戶兜售東西的推銷員按了一幢郊區房子的門鈴後，

　　he was taken a back when a 10-year-old boyopened the door smoking a big cigar.

　　他嚇了一跳，開門的竟是一位嘴裡叼著一根大雪茄的十歲男孩。

　　The salesman could only stammer out, "Er, is your mother at home?"

　　推銷員結結巴巴地問道，“哦，你媽媽在家嗎?”

　　Answered the boy, "What do you think?"

　　小男孩回答說，"你認為呢?"

　　經典英語笑話：城裡來的傻瓜

　　Two city folk were on a drive in the country, but got completely lost.

　　兩個城市裡的老兄在一條鄉間小道上開車迷了路，

　　Pulling over next to an old farmer, they asked him if he knew the way back to the city.

　　他們把車停靠一位老農夫旁邊，問他知不知道回城裡的路。

　　"Nope. Can't say that I do," replied the old hayseed.

　　“不，我不知道，”老農夫答道。

　　"Well, can you tell us how to get back to the main highway?"

　　“那你知道回到主要公路要怎麼走嗎?’

　　"Nope. Don't know that, either. "

　　“不，我也不知道。”

　　"Well, you sure don't know much, do you?"

　　"喔，你好像不太熟悉這裡的路況，是嗎?"

　　" Could be. . . but I ain't lost, neither."

　　“可以這麼說，……可是我也不會迷路。”

　　經典英語笑話：好投入啊

　　Mrs. Fortesque was getting more and more worried.

　　福特斯克太太越來越擔心，

　　Her husband had left for a round of golf early in the morning and by mid-afternoon he still wasn't home.

　　因為她先生一早出去打高爾夫球，到下午三四點都還沒回家，

　　Evening came and Mr.Fortesque still hadn't returned.

　　甚至到傍晚也還不見人影。

　　The lady was just about to call the police when she heard her husband's car pulling into the driveway,

　　福特斯克太太正要打電話報警就聽到她先生開車回來了。

　　Rushing outside, she told her husband, "Darling, I was so worried about you. What kept you?"

　　她衝出門外，向她先生說道："親愛的，我一整天都在擔心你，是什麼事把你耽擱了?"

　　"Charlie had a heart attack on the fourth hole."

　　“查理在第四洞時心臟病發作。”

　　"Oh, my goodness, that's terrible!"

　　“喔，天哪，真可怕!”

　　"You're telling me! All day long it was shoot the ball, drag Charlie, shoot the ball, drag Charlie . . . . "

　　“那還用你說嗎!-整天我都一邊打球，一邊拉查理，一會兒打球，一會兒拖查理，……