簡短英語笑話帶翻譯大全
笑話是現代社會發展最快的一種口頭文學體裁,它體現了某一民族行為中最深刻的和潛意識中的觀點;笑話能反映出一個民族的價值系統及其對周圍世界肯定和否定的態度。小編整理了簡短英語笑話帶翻譯，歡迎閱讀!
簡短英語笑話帶翻譯：Talking clock
While proudly showing off his new apartment to friends, a college student led the way into theden***私室，賊窩*** . What is the big brass gong***鑼*** and hammer for? one of his friends asked. That is the talking clock, the man replied. How's it work?
Watch, the man said and proceeded to give the gong an ear shattering pound with the hammer. Suddenly, someone screamed from the other side of the wall, Knock it off, you idiot! It's two o'clock in the morning!
會說話的鐘
一個學生帶他朋友們參觀他的新公寓，甚是得意。那個大銅鑼和錘子是幹什麼用的?他的一個朋友問他。那玩意兒厲害了，那是一個會說話的鐘，學生回答。這鐘怎麼工作的，他的朋友問。看著，別眨眼了，那學生走上前一把操起銅鑼和錘子，拼命地敲了一下，聲音震耳欲聾。突然，他們聽到隔壁牆那邊有人狂叫，別敲了，你這白痴!現在是凌晨兩點鐘了!
簡短英語笑話帶翻譯：Your Coat Is on Fire
The master, to impress on his pupils the need of thinking before speaking, told them to count fifty before saying anything important, and one hundred if it was very important.
The next day he was speaking, standing with his back to the fire, when he noticed several lips moving rapidly. Suddenly the whole class shouted: Ninety-eight, ninety-nine, a hundred. Your coat is on fire, sir!
您的大衣著火了
老師為了讓學生記住先思考後發言，告訴他們在說出重要事情之前先數到50，如果是特別重要的事情，要先數到100。 第二天，當老師背靠著火爐講課時，發現好幾個學生的嘴脣在很快地不停地動。突然，全班學生一起喊道：“九十八，九十九，一百。老師，您的大衣著火了!”
簡短英語笑話帶翻譯：Rope or Ox 到底是繩子還是公牛
The man in the prison asked a new comer why he was sent there. The new comer answered: I am out of luck, I think. A few days ago I was walking in the street when I saw a piece of dirty rope. I thought nobody wanted it and so I picked it up and took it home. But it is not against the law to pick up a piece of rope and take home! I told you I had bad luck, didn't I? the man sighed, The trouble is that I didn't notice there was an ox at the other end of that rope.
繩子還是公牛? 在監獄裡，一個人問新來的犯人為什麼被關進來。新來的犯人回答說：“我想我真是倒黴。幾天前我在街上走的時候，看到一根髒繩子，以為沒人要了，便撿起來帶了回家。” “但是，撿一根繩子帶回家並不犯法啊!” “我告訴過你我倒黴了吧?”那個人嘆了口氣，“麻煩的就是我沒有注意到繩子的那一頭還有一頭公牛。”
簡短英語笑話帶翻譯：A Dying Man's Favorite Cookies
An elderly man lay dying in his bed. In death's agony, he suddenly smelled the aroma of his favorite chocolate chip cookies wafting up the stairs. He gathered his remaining strength, and lifted himself from the bed. Leaning against the wall, he slowly made his way out of the bedroom, and with even greater effort forced himself down the stairs, gripping the railing with both hands. With labored breath, he leaned against the door frame, gazing into the kitchen.
Were it not for death's agony, he would have thought himself already in heaven: there, spread out upon newspapers on the kitchen table were literally hundreds of his favorite chocolate chip cookies. Was it heaven? Or was it one final act of heroic love from his devoted wife, seeing to it that he left this world a happy man?
Mustering one great final effort, he threw himself toward the table, landing on his knees in arumpled posture. His parched lips parted; the wondrous taste of the cookie was already in his mouth; seemingly bringing him back to life. The agedand withered hand, shockingly made its way to a cookie at the edge of the table, when it was suddenly smackedwith a spatula by his wife.
Stay out of those, she said, they're for the funeral.
臨死者最愛吃的小甜餅
一位瀕臨死亡的老人正躺在他的床上，承受著死亡的煎熬。突然一股香味順著樓下飄了上來，那正是他最喜歡的巧克力小薄餅的味道。他用盡吃奶的力氣掙扎著從床上爬了起來，倚著牆，慢慢地走出了臥室，並且用最後的力量用雙手抓住扶手走下了樓梯。老人靠在門框上，嘴裡喘著氣，眼睛凝神著廚房。
如果不是因為承受著臨死的痛苦，老人會認為自己到了天堂。那裡，在廚房鋪著報紙的桌子上，確切地說有數百個他最喜歡吃的巧克力小薄餅。真在天堂嗎?還是他那離婚妻子的最後一次英雄般的愛心顯示，以便讓他開心地離開這個世界?
集中最後的力量，老人跪著雙膝掙扎著移向桌子。他口乾舌燥，嘴巴張開。他感受到了美妙的甜餅味道，彷彿要將他帶回人世。他的一隻年邁乾癟的手顫顫悠悠地伸向桌子邊緣的一隻小甜餅。突然，他妻子扔過一把鏟子，砸在他的手上。
“離遠點”，他妻子說。“這是為你的葬禮準備的。”
簡短英語笑話帶翻譯：Guns Buried in the Garden
An old man lived alone in Northern Ireland. His only son was in prison. The old man wanted to plant some potatoes in his garden but he didn't know anyone who would help him plow up the garden.
He wrote to his son about it, and received this reply, For HEAVENS SAKE, don't dig up that garden, that's where I buried the GUNS!
At 4 AM the next morning, a dozen British soldiers showed up and dug up the entire garden, but didn't find any guns.
Confused, the man wrote to his son telling him what happened and asking him what to do next.
His son's reply was: Just plant your potatoes.
埋在花園裡的槍
一個老人獨居在北愛爾蘭，他的獨生子正在坐牢。老人想在花園裡種些土豆，但不知道誰可以幫忙把泥土翻鬆。他寫信想兒子提及此事，兒子回信說道：“看在上帝的面上，千萬不要翻鬆花園的泥土，我把槍埋在那兒了。”
第二天凌晨4點，一隊英國士兵出現在老人家中，在花園把土地翻遍，但並沒有找到任何槍支。”
老人寫信告訴兒子這件奇怪的事情，問到底發生了什麼事情，下一步應該怎麼做。
兒子回信道：“你只管種土豆好了。”