經典英語笑話爆笑欣賞
笑話是日常生活中常見的一種幽默。與一般日常會話不同,笑話刻意違反合作原則,由此衍生出會話含意,並利用會話含意之間的衝突實現其預定功能。小編精心收集了經典爆笑英語笑話，供大家欣賞學習!
經典爆笑英語笑話篇1
Mother asked her little boy, "Darling, what did the teacher teach you today?" "Nothing, Mum,"answered the son proundly, "instead, she asked me how much one plus two was, and I told herthree."
母親問她年幼的兒子：“寶貝，今天老師教了你些什麼?” 兒子驕傲地說：“什麼都沒教，媽媽。她反倒問我一加二等於幾，我告訴她等於三。”
經典爆笑英語笑話篇2
A schoolboy went home with a pain in his stomach. "Well, sit down and eat your tea," said his mother. "Your stomach's hurting because it's empty. It'll be all right when you've got something in it." Shortly afterwards Dad come in from the office, complaining of a headache. "That's because it's empty," said his bright son. "You'd be all right if you had something in it."
一個男孩放學回家時，覺得肚子痛。“來，坐下，吃點點心，”媽媽說，“你肚子痛是因為肚子是空的。吃點東西就會好的。” 一會兒，男孩的爸爸下班回家了，說是頭痛。 “你頭痛是因為你的腦袋是空的，”他那聰明的兒子說，“裡面裝點東西，就會好的。”
經典爆笑英語笑話篇3
Bill is a good student and an intelligent boy. He likes to study arithmetic, and he can do all ofthe arithmetic problems in his book easily. One day on his way to school Bill passed a fruitstore. There was a sign in the window which said, "Apple-Six for five cents." An idea came to Billand he went into the store. "How much are the apples?" he asked the store. "Six for five cents." "But I don't want six apples." "How many apples do you want?" "It is not a question of howmany apples I want. It is a problem in arithmetic." "What do you mean by a problem inarithmetic?" asked the man. "Well, if six apples are wroth five cents, then five apples are worthfour cents, four apples are worth three cents, three apples are worth rwo cents, two apples areworth one cent and one apple is worth nothing. I only want one apple, and if one apple is worthnothing then it is not necessary for me to pay you." Bill picked out a good apple, began to eatit, and walked happily out of the store. The man looked at the young boy with such surprisethat he could not say a word.
比爾是一個好學生，也是個聰明的孩子。他喜歡學數學，課本上所有的數學問題他都能不費勁地解答。 有一天，在上學路上，比爾經過一家水果店。該店窗戶上有個招牌上寫著：“蘋果--五美分六個。”比爾腦筋一轉，進了店門。 “蘋果怎麼賣?” “五美分六個。” “但我不想要六個。” “你想要幾個?” “這不是我想要幾個的問題。這是個數學問題。” “數學問題?你說這話是什麼意思?” “你看，如果六個蘋果五美分，那麼五個蘋果四美分，四個蘋果三美分，三個蘋果二美分，二個蘋果一美分，一個蘋果就不要錢。我只要一個蘋果，如果一個蘋果一分錢也不要的話，那我也就沒必要給你錢了。” 比爾揀了一個好蘋果，開始吃了起來，然後興高采烈地邁出了店門。那個售貨員吃驚地望著這個小男孩，一句話也說不出來。
經典爆笑英語笑話篇4
Jimmy started painting when he was three years old, and when he was five, he was already verygood at it. He painted many beautiful and interesting pictures, and people paid a lot of moneyfor them. They said, "This boy's going to be famous when he's little older, and then we're goingto sell these pictures for a lot more money." Jimmy's pictures were different from other people'sbecause he never painted on all of the paper. He painted on half of it, and the other half wasalways empty. "That's very clever," everyone said, "Nobody else does that!" One day somebodybought one of Jimmy's pictures and then said to him, "Please tell me this, Jimmy. Why do youpaint on the bottom half of your pictures, but not on the top half?" "Because I'm small," Jimmysaid, "and my burshes don't reach very high."
吉米三歲開始畫畫，五歲時已經畫得很好了。他畫了很多美麗而有趣的畫，人們出高價購買。他們說，“這個孩子長大一點肯定會出名，我們可以靠這些畫大賺一筆。” 吉米的畫與眾不同。因為他從來不在整張紙上作畫。他只畫一半的紙，而另一半他總空著。 “構思多麼巧妙啊!”大家都說，“從來沒有人這麼做過。” 有一天，一個人買了吉米的畫，然後問他：“請告訴我，吉米，你為什麼總是在紙的下半部分畫畫，而不是在紙的上半部分?” 吉米說，“因為我個頭小，夠不著上面。”