英語爆笑笑話帶翻譯的

　　冷笑話是近幾年出現的一個新詞,也是一種出現在我們身邊的不可忽視的新的語言現象,它具有強大的生命力。下面是小編帶來的，歡迎閱讀!

　　篇一

　　I hung him up to dry 我把他吊起來讓他晾乾

　　Jim and Mary were both patients in a Mental Hospital.

　　Jim和Mary都是精神病院裡的病人。

　　One day while they were walking by the hospital swimming pool, Jim suddenly jumped into the deep end. He sank to the bottom.

　　一天，他們沿著醫院的游泳池散步，Jim突然跳入泳池的深水區，他沉到了底部。

　　Mary promptly jumped in to save him. She swam to the bottom and pulled Jim out.

　　Mary立刻跳下去救他，她潛到水底，把Jim拉了上來。

　　When the medical director became aware of Mary's heroic act he immediately reviewed her file and called her into his office.

　　當院長聽聞了Mary的英勇行為後，他立刻翻看了她的病歷檔案,把她叫進了自己的辦公室，“Mary，我有一個好訊息和一個壞訊息要告訴你。

　　"Mary, I have good news and bad news. The good news is you're being discharged because since you were able to jump in and save the life of another patient, I think you've regained your senses.

　　好訊息是你能跳入水中救其他病人，這說明你的意識已經恢復了，你可以出院了。壞訊息就是，Jim，你救的那個病人，他還是用自己的浴袍帶子在浴室上吊自殺了。”

　　The bad news is Jim, the patient you saved, hung himself with his bathrobe belt in the bathroom，he's dead." Mary replied, "He didn't hang himself, I hung him up to dry."

　　Mary說：“他沒有自殺，是我把他吊起來好讓他晾乾。”

　　篇二

　　In the middle of nowhere 這到底是哪

　　Stormy weather diverted our Dallas-bound flight to another airport.

　　雨暴天氣使我們本來飛往達拉斯的航班不得不轉飛另一個機場。

　　As we approached the runway, the pilot came on the intercom:"For those of you who are not familiar with the area,this is Lubbock, Texas.

　　當我們的飛機靠近跑道的時候，飛行員通過對講機說：“對於那些對這個地區不熟悉的人，這裡是德州的Lubbock”。

　　"Then he paused."And for those of you who are familiar with this area,I think this is Lubbock, Texas."

　　然後他停頓了一下，接著說，“對於那些熟悉這個地區的人，我感覺這裡就是德州的Lubbock了”。

　　篇三

　　Is she pregnant? 她懷孕了嗎

　　A woman went to the doctor's office where she was seen by one of the new doctors ...

　　有個婦女去看病，為她診治的是一名年輕的醫生。

　　but after 4 minutes in the examination room, she burst out, screaming as she ran down the hall.

　　檢查進行了大約四分鐘，她哭著跑了出去，在走廊裡面一邊跑一邊大叫著。

　　An older doctor stopped her and asked what the problem was, and she told him her story.

　　一位老醫生攔住了她，問她發生了什麼事，婦女告訴了他事情的經過。

　　After listening, he had her sit down and relax in another room.

　　聽她說完，老醫生讓她坐在另一間屋子裡放鬆一下，

　　The older doctor marched down the hallway to the back where the first doctor was and demanded, "What's the matter with you?

　　他自己穿過走廊來到新醫生的辦公室：“你是怎麼搞的?

　　Mrs. Terry is 63 years old, she has four grown children and seven grandchildren, and you told her she was pregnant?"

　　特里太太今年63歲，她的四個孩子都成年了，還有7個孫子孫女，可是你居然對她說她懷孕了?”

　　The new doctor continued to write on his clipboard and without looking up said, "Does she still have the hiccups?"

　　新醫生繼續做著他的紀錄，眼皮都沒抬一下：“她現在還打嗝嗎?”

　　篇四

　　I would prefer the traditional service我還是喜歡傳統的儀式

　　A young couple met with their pastor to set a date for their wedding.

　　一對年輕的夫婦和牧師商定婚禮的日期。

　　When he asked whether they preferred a contemporary or a traditional service, they opted for the contemporary.

　　牧師問他們是喜歡當代儀式還是傳統的，他們選擇了當代的。

　　On the big day, a major storm forced the groom to take an alternate route to the church. The streets were flooded, so he rolled up his pant legs to keep his trousers dry.

　　婚禮那天，強烈的暴風雨迫使新郎走了另一條路去教堂。街上積水很深，為了避免弄溼褲子他捲起了褲腿。

　　When he finally reached the church, his best man rushed him into the sanctuary and up to the altar, just as the ceremony was starting.

　　最後他終於來到了教堂，伴郎趕忙擁他進了大殿走上聖壇，典禮開始了。

　　"Pull down your pants, whispered the pastor. "Uh, Reverend, I've changed my mind," the groom responded. "I think I would prefer the traditional service."

　　“把褲腿放下來。”牧師小聲說。“嗯，牧師，我改變主意了，”新郎說，“我想我還是喜歡傳統的儀式。”