英語小笑話大全爆笑簡短

　　交際場合,能恰到好處地講個笑話或自創一個幽默,不僅可以體現自己的語言水平,還可以提升個人魅力。小編精心收集了簡短爆笑的英語小笑話，供大家欣賞學習!

　　簡短爆笑的英語小笑話篇1

　　A big battle was going on during the First World War.Guns were firing， and shells and bullets were flying about everywhere.After an hour of this， one of the soldiers decidedthat the fighting was getting too dangerous for him， so he leftthe front line and began to go away from the battle. After hehad walked for an hour，he saw an officer coming towardshim. The officer stopped him and said，“ where are you going?” “I'm trying to get as far away as possible from the battlethat's going on behind us， sir，” the soldier answered. “Do you know who I am?” the officer said to him angrily.“I'm your commanding officer.” The soldier was very surprised when he heard this and said，“My God，I didn't know that I was so far back already!”

　　第一次世界大戰期間，一場大戰役正在進行。槍炮轟鳴，炮彈和子彈到處亂飛。這樣過了一個小時後，一個士兵認定戰鬥對他來說變得太危險了，所以他離開前線開始逃離戰場。步行了一個小時之後，他看見一個軍官向他走過來。那軍官叫住他說：“你要到哪兒去?” “長官，我正儘可能遠地躲開我們身後正在進行的戰役，”士兵回答說。 “你知道我是誰嗎?”軍官生氣地對他說：“我是你的指揮官。” 那士兵聽到此話感到非常驚訝，說：“天哪，我想不到我已經往回跑了這麼遠了!”

　　簡短爆笑的英語小笑話篇2

　　The father was reading the school report which had just been handed to him by his hopeful son. His brow was wrathful***憤怒的*** as he read,

　　"English, poor. French, weak. mathematics, fair." and he gave a glance of disgust at the quakinglad***少年，小夥子***.

　　"Well, Dad." said the son, "It is not as good as it might be, but have you seen that?" And he pointed to the next line which read, "health, excellent."

　　父親在看他那滿懷希望的兒子帶回來的學校成績單。他邊看邊露出憤怒的表情：

　　“英語，差;法語，差;數學，中。”他厭惡地瞥了在發抖的兒子一眼。

　　“爸爸，”兒子說，“可能成績不夠理想。但您看到那一項了嗎?”他指了指下一行：“健康狀況，優。”

　　簡短爆笑的英語小笑話篇3

　　發現萬有引力

　　The teacher was vividly describing the discovery of the law of gravitation. He tried to make the children impressed with its importance.

　　He said, "Isaac Newton was sitting on the ground looking at the tree. An apple suddenly fell on his head. It led him discover gravitation." And he added, "Isn't that wonderful?"

　　The "smart boy" in the class replied in a high voice: "Yes, teacher, and he was very fortunate. If looking at his books, he wouldn't have discovered anything."

　　教師很生動地描述萬有引力定律的發現，他想讓學生對它的重要性留下深刻的印象。

　　他說：“艾薩克·牛頓坐在地上，望著那棵樹。忽然又一個蘋果掉下來落到他的頭上。這就促使他發現了萬有引力。”他還接著說：“這不是很奇妙嗎?”

　　這時班上那個被叫做“精仔”的男孩尖著嗓子回答說：“是的，老師，而且還很幸運。如果他是坐在學校裡看著書本，就什麼也不會發現了。”