高中英語三分鐘笑話

　　魯迅先生的雜文用笑話作比,飛躍聯想,把抽象的事物說得淺顯明白,饒有興味,使人們在笑談中潛移默化領會作者的主旨。下面是小編帶來的，歡迎閱讀!

　　篇一

　　Gotta Have Faith要有信心

　　The is a story about a monastery in Europe perched high on cliff several hundred feet in th air.

　　有個關於在 歐洲座落於高空好幾百英尺懸涯高處的修道院故事。

　　The only way to reach the monastery was to be suspended in a basket which was pulled to the top by several monks who pulled and tugged with all their strength .

　　到達修道院。唯一的方法，就是被懸吊在由數名修道士用盡他們全力拖拉到山頂的籃子裡。

　　Obviously the ride up the steep cliff in that basket was terrifying.

　　很明顯的，乘坐籃子爬上陡峭的懸崖是相當令人害怕的。

　　One tourist got exceedingly nervous about half-way up as he noticed that the rope by which he was suspended was old and frayed.

　　有位旅客約在半途中，注意到懸掛他的繩子很老舊而且被磨損時，心中感到極度緊張不安。

　　With trembing voice,he asked the monked who was riding with him in the basket how often they changed the rope.

　　他用顫抖的聲音詢問與他一同乘坐在籃子裡的修道士，他們多久換繩子一次。

　　The monk thought for a moment and answered brusquely,"Whenever it breaks."

　　修道士想了一會，然後粗率地回答：“繩子斷掉時。”

　　篇二

　　Gone Shopping購物

　　Our supermarket had a sald on boneless chicken breasts,and a woman I know ontended to stock up .

　　我們的超級市，場在廉價拍賣無骨雞胸，我認識的某位女士打算去多買一些。

　　At the store,However,she was disappointed to find only a few skimpy prepackaged portopns of the poultry,

　　然而，到了這家肉店的時候她感到很失望，因為只找到一點點事先就包裝好的雞肉，

　　so she complained to the butcher.

　　所以她就向這位肉店老闆抱怨。

　　"don't worry,lady," he said.

　　他說：“小姐，別擔心，

　　"I will pack some more trays and have them ready for you by the time you finish shopping."

　　我會替你多包幾盤，在你買完東西的時候把它們準備好。”

　　Several aisles later ,my friend heard the butcher's voice boom over th public-address system:

　　逛完幾個走道之後，我的朋友聽到肉店老闆的聲音透過公共廣播系統隆隆地說

　　"Will the lady who wanted bigger breasts please meet me at the back of the store?"

　　“那位想要大胸部的小姐請到本店後方來見我好嗎?”

　　篇三

　　Why為什麼

　　A cemetery grounds keeper was going about his rounds when he saw a man lying on a grave,

　　“位墓園管理員在巡視的時候，看見一名男子躺在墳墓上，

　　sobbing loudly and pounding his fits on the ground,

　　大聲哭泣，並且用他的拳頭重重地敲打地面.他悲痛地說：

　　"Why did you have to die?Oh,why?Why?Why?"he lamented.

　　"你為什麼一定要死?哦，為什麼?為什麼?為什麼?”

　　"A loved one's passing is a terrible lose."the grounds keeper offered in consolation,

　　墓園管理員安慰他說“心愛的人死去是個很難受的損失，

　　"but someday,the pain will pass."

　　但是終有一天，傷痛會過去的。”

　　"Love one?" the weeping man said ,looking up.

　　這位哭泣的男子抬起頭看著他說：“心愛的人?

　　" I didn't even know the guy."

　　我根本不認識這個人。…

　　"Then why all the tears? "

　　"那為什麼要痛哭流涕呢?…"

　　"He was my wife's first husband!"

　　"他是我老婆的笫一任老公呀!”

　　篇四

　　The job interview工作中的面試

　　Reaching the end of a job interview ,

　　到了工作面試的最後部分，

　　the personnel recruitment officer asken a young engineer fresh out of Cambridge,

　　人事招聘主管問一位剛從劍橋 橋畢業的年輕工程師：

　　" And what starting salary were you looking for?"

　　“你想要起薪多少呢 ?”

　　The engineer said,"In the neighborhood of $140,000 a year,depending on the benefits package ."

　　工程師說 ：“太約一年十四萬左右吧，要視整體福利而定。”

　　The interviewer said,"Well ,what would you say to a package of 5-weeks vacation,

　　面試主管說：“嗯，五個禮拜的假期，

　　14 paid holidays,full medical and dental,

　　十四天帶薪假，全額補助醫療和看牙科，

　　company matching retirement fund to 50% of salary ,

　　百分之五十薪資的公司相對退休基金，

　　and a company car leased every 2 years ,say,a red sports Mercedes? "

　　每兩年公司租用配車，比如說，紅色的賓士跑車，你覺得怎么樣呀?”

　　The engineer sat up straight and said ,

　　工程師挺直坐著說：

　　"Wow!Are you kidding?"

　　“哇!你在開玩笑吧?”

　　And the interviewer replied,"Yeah,but you started it."

　　面試主管回答說 ：“對呀。不過是你起頭的呀。”