幽默生活英語故事四則

　　在日常繁忙的生活，也不要忘記了放鬆自己。下面小編為大家帶來幽默生活英語笑話四則，希望大家喜歡!

　　幽默生活英語笑話：三個有趣的教授

　　There were three professors at the railway station. They were deep in conversation. The train had just arrived，but they didn’t notice it.Then the guard shouted，"Take your seats please !”

　　三位教授在火車站。他們正聚精會神地談話。火車進站了他們都沒發現。這時列車員喊道:“請上車了!”

　　The professors heard the guard and rushed for the train.Two of them got on the train before it moved. The third one was left behind.It was Professor Egghead. He looked worried.

　　教授們聽到後趕緊向火車跑去，兩位教授剛登上火車，火車就開動了。另一位叫艾哈德的教授沒能趕上。他看上去很著急。

　　One of the professor's students was at the station. He tried to comfort the professor.“It wasn’t really bad，sir,”said the student. "Two out of three caught the train. That is quite good，you know.”“I know，”the professor said.“But it was my train. My friends only came to say goodbye.”

　　教授的一位學生也在車站等車。他盡力安慰教授。他說:“這還不是很糟，三個人有兩個上了火車。您要知道這已經不錯了。”教授說:“我知道，可我是來趕火車的，那兩位朋友是來為我送行的。”

　　幽默生活英語笑話：貢獻

　　A friend of mine, a Sunday-school teacher，attended a church dinner with her husband，who isn't much of a church一goer. The pastor asked each person to stand，introduce himself and describe his contribution. As it became apparent to the husband that everyone else was deeply involved，he grew more and more uncomfortable. But when it was his turn to speak，he rose to the occasion. Thinking of his six children，he said，"my name is Dave，and I supply the kids for the Sunday school.”

　　我的一位朋友是一個主日學校的教師。她和丈夫一起去參加教堂的晚餐會，而她的丈夫是不怎麼去教堂的。牧師請每個人站起來做自我介紹，並講述自己對教會的貢獻。她的丈夫看出，別人都比他更關心教會的工作，他變得越來越不自在。但是，該他說話時，他很好地對付了這一局面。他想到自己有六個孩子，就說:“我叫大衛，我為主日學校提供了學生。”

　　He got a standing ovation.

　　他的話贏得一片掌聲。

　　幽默生活英語笑話：請假

　　"So you want another day off,”snorted the teacher to his student，Tom.“I am anxious to hear what excuse you have this time. You have been off for your grandfather's funeral four times already.”

　　“這麼說，你又要請一天假，”老師怒氣衝衝地對他的學生湯姆說，“我倒想知道你這次找什麼藉口。你已經請了四次假說去參加你爺爺的葬禮。”

　　Tom replied，"Today my grandma is getting married again.”

　　湯姆回答說:“今天是我奶奶再不次舉行婚禮。”

　　幽默生活英語笑話：數學教授

　　A math professor has just been knocked down by a speeding car. A police officer rushed over and asked，"Were you able to get the license number of the vehicle that hit you，sir?”

　　一位數學教授被一倆時速很快的車撞倒了。警察跑過去問:“先生，您能說出撞您的那輛車的車牌號碼嗎?”

　　The professor replied，"Well，not exactly，but I do recall that if the number was multiplied by itself，then divided by three，the square root of the answer would turn out to be the original number with the integers reversed.”

　　教授回答:“嗯，我說不準，可是我記得，如果將號碼自乘，再除以三，然後開方，則平方根正好同原數的次序顛倒過來。”