英語短笑話大全爆笑帶翻譯
笑點是一個意想不到,或是與現實完全相反的情節,也是一個笑話最重要的部分。下面是小編帶來的爆笑英語短笑話帶翻譯,歡迎閱讀!
爆笑英語短笑話帶翻譯篇一
怕老婆的老公 A Henpecked Husband
A henpecked husband was advised by a psychiatrist to assert himself.
有一位怕老婆的老公接受心理治療師的建議要堅持自己的主見。
"You don't have to let your wife bully you,"he said."Go home and show her you are the boss ."
他說:“你不必讓你的老婆像惡霸一樣欺侮你。回家去讓她知道你才是老大。”
The husband decided to take the doctor's asvice.He went home,slammed the door,shook his first in his wife's face,and growled,"
這位老公決定接受醫生的勸告。他回到家,用力啪答一聲關上門,在他老婆的面前:揮舞著拳頭,並且大聲咆哮說:
From now on you are talking orders from me.
“從現在起,你得乖乖聽我的命令。
I want my supper right now,and when you get it on the table ,go upstairs and lay out my clothes.
我現在就要吃晚餐,當你把它弄好放在餐桌上的時候,到樓上去把我的衣服擺放好。
Tonight I am going out with my friends.
今天晚上我要和我的。朋友外出,
You are going to stay at home where you belong.
你給我乖乖待在家裡不許亂跑。
Another thing,you know who is going to tie bow tie?"
另外還有一件事情,你知道誰要替我打蝴蝶結領結嗎?”
I certainlydo,"screamed the wife."The Undertaker."
老婆尖叫著說:“我當然知道。是收屍的人。”
爆笑英語短笑話帶翻譯篇二
The job interview 工作中的面試
Reaching the end of a job interview ,
到了工作面試的最後部分,
the personnel recruitment officer asken a young engineer fresh out of Cambridge,
人事招聘主管問一位剛從劍橋畢業的年輕工程師:
" And what starting salary were you looking for?"
“你想要起薪多少呢 ?”
The engineer said,"In the neighborhood of $140,000 a year,depending on the benefits package."
工程師說 :“太約一年十四萬左右吧,要視整體福利而定。”
The interviewer said,"Well ,what would you say to a package of 5-weeks vacation,
面試主管說:“嗯,五個禮拜的假期,
14 paid holidays,full medical and dental,
十四天帶薪假,全額補助醫療和看牙科,
company matching retirement fund to 50% of salary ,
百分之五十薪資的公司相對退休基金,
and a company car leased every 2 years ,say,a red sports Mercedes? "
每兩年公司租用配車,比如說,紅色的賓士跑車,你覺得怎么樣呀?”
The engineer sat up straight and said ,
工程師挺直坐著說:
"Wow!Are you kidding?"
“哇!你在開玩笑吧?”
And the interviewer replied,"Yeah,but you started it."
面試主管回答說 :“對呀。不過是你起頭的呀。”
爆笑英語短笑話帶翻譯篇三
wife's first husband 老婆的笫一任老公
A cemetery grounds keeper was going about his rounds when he saw a man lying on a grave,
“位墓園管理員在巡視的時候,看見一名男子躺在墳墓上,
sobbing loudly and pounding his fits on the ground,
大聲哭泣,並且用他的拳頭重重地敲打地面.他悲痛地說:
"Why did you have to die?Oh,why?Why?Why?"he lamented.
"你為什麼一定要死?哦,為什麼?為什麼?為什麼?”
"A loved one's passing is a terrible lose."the grounds keeper offered in consolation,
墓園管理員安慰他說“心愛的人死去是個很難受的損失,
"but someday,the pain will pass."
但是終有一天,傷痛會過去的。”
"Love one?" the weeping man said ,looking up.
這位哭泣的男子抬起頭看著他說:“心愛的人?
" I didn't even know the guy."
我根本不認識這個人。…
"Then why all the tears? "
"那為什麼要痛哭流涕呢?…"
"He was my wife's first husband!"
"他是我老婆的笫一任老公呀!”