長篇英語笑話3篇帶翻譯笑死人的

　　英語笑話是指以一句英文短語或一個英文故事讓說話者和聽者之間覺得好笑,或是產生幽默感,笑話是一種經過藝術加工的語言形式,是藝術化的語言,笑話是一種藝術方法。下面小編給大家推薦三篇英語長篇笑話帶翻譯，希望大家喜歡。

　　長篇英語笑話帶翻譯一：

　　A gentleman was sitting quietly in a first-class compartment. Two ladies got in. One of them saw that the window was open and she shut it before sitting down."Open it again," said the second lady, "I'll die of suffocation***窒息，悶死*** if there is no fresh air.""I won't open it," said the first lady, "I'll die of cold if the window is open."A querrel started, and it continued until the gentleman spoke:"Let's have the window shut until this lady has died of suffocation, and then we can have it open until this lady has died of cold. After that it will be nice and quiet in here again."

　　解決問題的好辦法 一位紳士正靜靜地坐在頭等包廂裡，有兩位女士走了進來。其中一位見窗戶開著，就在落坐之前把窗戶“把窗戶開啟，”第二位女士說道，“如果沒有新鮮空氣，我會被憋死的。” “不能開啟，”第一位說道，“如果它開著，我會被凍死的。” 一場爭吵開始，沒完沒了，直到那位紳士開口： “我們先讓窗戶關著，直到把這位女士憋死，然後再開啟窗戶，直到把這位女士凍死。那以後，這兒就可以恢復平靜了。”

　　長篇英語笑話帶翻譯二：

　　One real man

　　The ruler of an ancient kingdom wanted to disprove the statement that the men of his domain were ruled by their wives. He had all the males in his kingdom brought before him and warned that any man who did not tell the truth would be punished severely***嚴格地，嚴厲地***.

　　Then he asked all the men who obeyed their wives' directions and counsel***勸告，建議*** to step to the left side of the hall. All the men did so but one little man who moved to the right.

　　It's good to see, said the king, that we have one real man in the kingdom. Tell thesechickenhearted***膽小的*** dunces***傻瓜*** why you alone among them stand on the right side of the hall.

　　Your Majesty, came the reply in a squealing voice, it is because before I left home my wife told me to keep out of crowds.

　　一個真正的男子漢

　　古代有一個國王，他想證明他領土內的男人並非像人們傳說的那樣，受到老婆的管制。他把王國裡所有的男人都召到跟前，警告說，哪個男人膽敢不說實話，就會受到嚴厲的懲罰。

　　然後，他叫所有聽從妻子的命令和意見的男人都走向大廳的左側。所有的男人都站到了左側，只有一個小個子男人站到了右側。

　　國王說：看到我們國家裡還有一個真正的男子漢，真是令人高興。告訴這些膽小的笨蛋，為什麼在他們當中只有你一個人站在大廳的右側。

　　陛下，那人尖聲地回答：因為在我出門之前，我老婆告訴我不要扎堆。

　　長篇英語笑話帶翻譯三：

　　A preacher is buying a parrotAre you sure it doesnt scream, yell, or swear? asked the preacher.Oh absolutely. Its a religious parrot, the storekeeper assures him.Do you see those strings on his legs? When you pull the right one, he recites the lords prayer, and when you pull on the left he recites the 23rd Psalm.Wonderful! says the preacher, but what happens if you pull both strings?I fall off my perch, you stupid fool! screeched the parrot.

　　一個傳教士在買鸚鵡

　　“你確信它不會尖叫，大叫或詛咒別人嗎?”傳教士問。“哦，絕對不會。它是一隻虔誠的鸚鵡。”店主保證說。“你看見它腿上的這些細繩了嗎?當你拉動右面的這根，它會背誦天主經，當你拉動左面的那根，它會背誦讚美詩”“太棒了!”傳教士說，“但是如果我同時拉動兩條繩子，會發生什麼呢?”“我會從樹幹上掉下去的，你這個笨蛋!”鸚鵡尖聲說道。