妙趣幽默英語笑話

　　在日常繁忙的生活中，也不要忘了放鬆自己的心情。下面是小編為大家帶來，希望大家喜歡!

　　：你停止打你妻子了嗎

　　This story is toldaf abrawbeating counsel,who habituaHy endeavored to terrorize his opponent's witnesses.

　　這個故事講的是一個咄咄逼人的辯護律師，他慣於設法恐嚇對方的證人。

　　One witness rather tended to preface his replies with lengthy explanations.

　　有一個證人習慣於在回答間題之前先做番冗長的解釋。

　　“I want 'yes' or ‘no,’”thundered counsel. "There is no need for you to argue the point!"

　　“我要你回答‘是’或者‘不是’，一辯護律師怒喝道：¨你沒有必要就這個問題進行辯論。

　　“But there are some questions which cannot be answered by ' yes' or sno,’"mildly responded the witness.

　　“可是有些問題無法用‘是’或者‘不是’來回答。”這位證人溫和地回敬他。

　　"There are not!"snapped the lawyer.

　　“不存在這樣的問題”律師愚蠢地厲聲說。

　　"Oh,"said the witness, "answer this then: "Have you ceased beating your wife?"

　　"噢，”證人說：“那麼回答這個問題：你停止打你妻子了嗎?”

　　妙趣幽默英語笑話：中間戰術

　　Three competing store owners rented adjoining shops in a mall.

　　三個互相搶生意的商店老闆在一個購物中心裡租用了毗鄰的店鋪。

　　Observers waited for mayhem to ensue.

　　旁觀者等著瞧好戲。

　　The retailer on the right put up huge signs saying, "Gigantic Salel" and "Super Bargainsl"

　　右邊的零售商掛起了巨大的招牌，上書：“大減價!”“特便宜!”

　　The store on the left raised bigger signs proclaiming, "Prices Slashedl" and¨Fantastic Discountsl"The owner in the middle then prepared a large sign that simply stated,"ENTRANCE"

　　左邊的商店掛出了更大的招牌，聲稱：“大削價!”“超折扣!”中間的商人隨後準備了一個大招牌，上面只簡單地寫著：“***處“。

　　妙趣幽默英語笑話：新生兒

　　Mr. and Mrs. Taytor had a seven-year-old boy named Pat. Now Mrs. Taylor was expecting another child.

　　泰勒夫婦有一個七歲的男孩，名叫帕特。現在泰勒太太正懷著第二胎。

　　Pat had seen babies in other people's houses and had not liked them very much,so he was not delighted about the news that there was soon going to be one in his house too.

　　帕特在別人家看見過嬰兒，他不太喜歡他們，所以他對自己家裡也將有一個嬰兒的訊息感到不滿。

　　One evening Mr. and Mrs. Taylor were making plans for the baby's arrivat. "This house won't be big enough for us all when the babY comes,”said Mr. Taylor.

　　一天晚上，泰勒夫婦正在為這個嬰兒的降生計劃做安排。泰勒先生說：“有了嬰兒，我們的房子就太小，不夠住了。”

　　Pat came into the room just then and said, "What are you talking about?一"We were saying that we‘"have to move to another house now ,because the new baby's coming,"hismother answered.

　　帕特恰好在這個時候走進屋，他問：“你們在說什麼?”他的母親回答說：“我們在說我們得搬家，因為嬰兒就要誕生了。”

　　“lt's no use,"said Pat hopleesly, "He'll follow us there."

　　“搬了房子也不夠用，帕特絕地說，他也會跟我們到那兒去的。"