很簡單的英語笑話故事
民間笑話是一種根植於日常生活的美學形態。笑話產生於日常生活語境之中,以消遣和娛樂為目的,由普通民眾創造、表演和欣賞。小編精心收集了,供大家欣賞學習!
篇1
Point of No Return
My husband ordered home delivery of our local newspaper. Because we live in rural area where no street numbers are used, I was concerned that the carrier would have trouble finding us. Sure enough, we missed delivery several days despite frequent calls to the circulation department. Finally I phoned to cancel the subscription. "You'll have to tell me your exact location," the woman on the line said. "We can't cancel the subscription unless we know where you live.
有去無回
我丈夫預訂了當地報紙的戶送。因為我們住在鄉下,沒有街道號碼,所以我擔心送報員不易找到我們。果真如此,一連幾天都沒有報紙送來,儘管我們頻繁地往發行部打電話詢問。最後我打電話取消訂閱協議。“您得告訴我們您的準確位置,”電話中女子說,“除非我們知道您住在哪裡,否則我們不能取消訂閱協議。”
篇2
Do Me a Favor
The mechanic was very busy when I took my car in for repairs, so I settled down in the waiting room with a book I'd brought along. The mechanic was in and out answering calls, and at one point he stopped and looked at me . "Would you do me a favor and flip back a few pages when someone comes in? That way it won't look as if you've been here all day."
請幫個忙
我把車拖去修理,機械師很忙。所以我就坐在接待室,拿出我隨身帶來的書讀,機械師出出進進地打招呼。有一次,他停下來看了看我說:“你能幫我個忙嗎?有人進來時,把書翻回幾頁行嗎?那樣的話,就不會看上去你在這兒呆了一整天了。”
篇3
The Office Party
John, woke up after the annual office Christmas party with a pounding headache, cotton-mouthed and utterly unable to recall the events of the preceding evening.
After a trip to the bathroom, he made his way downstairs, where his wife put some coffee in front of him.
"Louise," he moaned, "tell me what happened last night. Was it as bad as I think?"
"Even worse," she said, her voice oozing scorn. "You made a complete ass of yourself. You succeeded in antagonising the entire board of directors and you insulted the president of the company, right to his face."
"He's an asshole," John said. "Piss on him."
"You did," came the reply. "And he fired you."
"Well, screw him!" said John.
"I did. You're back at work on Monday."
篇4
Paper
One day in class, the teacher told everyone to turn to a blank sheet of paper in their notebooks. She noticed that Chip, the dumb jock, was having trouble with her directions. "Have you found a blank piece yet, Chip?" said the teacher.
"Nope. I haven't," said the dumb jock. "Somebody went through and drew lines across all of the pages."
篇5
Dont Stop!
Mom: Didn't I tell you if any guy touches your boobs say "don't" and if he touches your pussy say "stop"?
Daughter: But mom, he touched both so I said "don't stop"