簡短而有內涵英語笑話

　　有人的地方就會有笑話，笑話一直是人們生活中的必需品。小編精心收集了，供大家欣賞學習!

　　：嗇鬼請客

　　The notorious cheap skate finally decided to have a party. Explaining to a friend how to find his apartment, he said, "Come up to 5M and ring the doorbell with your elbow. When the door open, push with your foot."

　　"Why use my elbow and foot?"

　　"Well, gosh," was the reply, "You're not coming empty-hangded, are you?"

　　吝嗇鬼請客

　　一個出了名的吝嗇鬼終於決定要請一次客了。他在向一個朋友解釋怎麼找到他家時說：“你上到五樓，找中間那個門，然後用你的胳膊肘按門鈴。門開了之後，再用你的腳把門推開。”

　　“為什麼要用我的肘和腳呢?”

　　“你的雙手得拿禮物啊。天哪，你總不會空著手來吧?”吝嗇鬼回答。

　　：我老婆的照片

　　A businessman enters a tavern, sits down at the bar, and orders a double martini on the rocks. After he finishes the drink, he peeks inside his shirt pocket, and then orders the bartender to prepare another double martini.

　　一個生意人走進一家酒館，在吧檯坐下，點了一杯加冰的雙料martini。喝完，那生意人往自己襯衣的口袋裡瞥了一眼，然後又讓服務員把杯子滿上。

　　After he finishes that, he again peeks inside his shirt pocket and orders the bartender to bring another double martini.

　　喝完，生意人又往自己襯衣的口袋裡瞥了一眼，然後又讓服務生幫他把杯子滿上。

　　The bartender says, "Look, buddy, I'll bring ya' martinis all night long - but you gotta tell me why you look inside your shirt pocket before you order a refill."

　　這時酒館的服務生說話了，“呃，老兄，我整個晚上給你倒martini都沒有問題，但你得告訴我，你為什麼在點下一杯酒前都要往自己襯衣的口袋裡偷偷看那麼一眼”。

　　The customer replies, "I'm peeking at a photo of my wife. When she starts to look good, I know it's time to go home."

　　生意人回答，“我看的是我老婆的一張照片。如果照片上的人開始變得好看起來，那就說明我喝得差不多了，該回家了。”

　　：Dad

　　Will and Bill were quarrelling about whose father was the stronger. Will said, "Well, you know the Pacific Ocean ? My father's the one who dug the hole for it."

　　Bill wasn't impressed, "Well, that's nothing. You know the Dead Sea ? My father's the one who killed it!"

　　中文翻譯：

　　維爾和比爾在爭吵，誰的爸爸是更強壯的一個。維爾說：“你知道太平洋嗎?　那個坑是我爸爸挖的。”

　　比爾不屑地說：“那沒什麼。你知道死海嗎? 那是我爸爸打死的。”