關於爆笑的英語笑話大全欣賞
笑話具有短小精悍、幽默風趣的特點,是一種深受人們喜愛的文體。有些笑話廣為流傳。人們笑過之後還能掩卷思考,獲得一些啟迪。小編分享關於爆笑的英語笑話，希望可以幫助大家!
關於爆笑的英語笑話：Light Bulb Joke
Just to give you the hang of it... How many Irish does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Five. One stands on top the table holding the bulb, the other four rotates the table.
How many Chinese does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two. One screws in the bulb, the other one gives you the bill.
How many Indians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Fifty. And they'll form a union after that.
How many Malays does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None. Malays are not supposed to screw anything other than their wives.
How many TNB workers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Ten. One screws in the light bulb, nine others claim overtime.
How many MIC members does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None. They can't reach the bulb.
Somebody threw all the chairs and tables.
How many Sarong Party Girls does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None. Sarong Party Girls don't screw anything that's yellow ***they only screw kuai lo***.
關於爆笑的英語笑話：Misc Jokes
Hubby : You always carry my photo in your handbag to the office. Why?
Wife : When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at your picture and the problem disappears.
Hubby : You see, how miraculous and powerful I am for you?
Wife : Yes, I see your picture and say to myself, "What other problem can there be greater than this one ?"
Girl : When we get married, I want to share all your worries, troubles and lighten your bunden.
Boy : It's very kind of you, darling. But I don't have any worries or troubles.
Girl : Well that's because we aren't married yet.
Son :
Mum, when I was on the bus with Dad this morning, he told me to give up my seat to a lady.
Mum : Well, you have done the right thing.
Son : But mum, I was sitting on daddy's lap.
Wife to husband : "What's your excuse for coming home at this time of the night?"
Husband to Wife : "Golfing with friends , my dear ."
Wife to Husband : "What?! At 2 a.m.?! "
Husband to Wife : "Yes . We used night clubs."
關於爆笑的英語笑話：A Cigars and Insurance
A Charlotte, NC, man having purchased a case of very rare, very expensive cigars insured them against fire among other things. Within a month, having smoked his entire stockpile of cigars and without having made even his first premium payment on the policy, the man filed a claim against the insurance company. In his claim, the man stated the cigars were lost "in a series of small fires".
The insurance company refused to pay, citing the obvious reason that the man had consumed the cigars in the normal fashion. The man sued.... and won. In delivering the ruling the judge agreeing that the claim was frivolous, stated nevertheless that the man held a policy from the company in which it had warranted that the cigars were insurable and also guaranteed that it would insure against fire, without defining what it considered to be "unacceptable fire", and was obligated to pay the claim.
Rather than endure a lengthy and costly appeal process the insurance company accepted the ruling and paid the man $15,000 for the rare cigars he lost in "the fires".
After the man cashed the check, however, the company had him arrested on 24 counts of arson. With his own insurance claim and testimony from the previous case being used against him, the man was convicted of intentionally burning his insured property and sentenced to 24 months in jail and a $24,000 fine.