關於幽默英語小短文有翻譯

　　英語學習在我國已轟轟烈烈地開展了幾十年。英語學習書籍各種各樣。從小學,初中,高中到大學不斷貫徹英語教學,可以說英語學習已成為一個熱門話題。本文是，希望對大家有幫助!

　　：Dead turtle 死去的烏龜

　　"Mommy, my turtle is dead," the little boy, Myrddin, sorrowfully told his mother, holding the turtle out to her in his hand.

　　"媽媽,我的烏龜死了,"小男孩默丁伸出手裡的烏龜給媽媽看,悲傷地對她說.

　　The mother kissed him on the head, then said," That's all right. We'll wrap him in tissue paper, put him in a little box, then have a nice burial ceremony in the back yard. After that, we'll go out for an ice cream soda, and then get you a new pet.

　　媽媽親了一下他的頭,說:"沒關係.我們用紙巾把它包起來,放到小盒子裡,再到後院舉行一個小葬禮.然後我們就去吃冰激凌,再買給你一個新寵物."

　　I don't want you...." Her voice trailed off as she noticed the turtle move. "Myrddin, your turtle is not dead after all."

　　"我不希望你..."媽媽的聲音變小了,因為她發現烏龜在動."默丁, 你的烏龜根本沒死."

　　"Oh," the disappointed boy, wanting ice cream and a new pet, said. "Can I kill it?".

　　"哦,"想著冰激凌和新寵物的男孩失望起來,"我能弄死它嗎?"

　　：Egg Donor 雞蛋捐贈人

　　One day, while Sue was cleaning under the bed, she found a small box. Curious, she opened it and found 3 eggs and 10,000 dollars. A little bit suspicious, she confronted her husband of twenty years about it.

　　一天，蘇在打掃床底下的時候，發現了一個小盒子。出於好奇，她把它開啟，發現裡面有3個雞蛋和一萬塊錢。她感覺有些可疑，就找結了婚20年的丈夫質問。

　　"Oh, that," Frank said. "Every time I cheated on you, I put an egg in this box." Sue was a bit unhappy about this, but figured that 3 affairs over twenty years wasn't so bad.

　　弗蘭克說：“哦，那個啊，每欺騙你一次，我就放一個雞蛋到盒子裡。”蘇雖然對此有點不開心，不過想到20年間才欺騙她3次，也不算很糟糕了。

　　"But what about the 10,000 dollars?"

　　“但是那一萬塊錢是怎麼會是?”

　　"Every time I got a dozen, I sold them."

　　“每當我攢夠了12個雞蛋，我就把它們賣了。”

　　：A Fishy Story

　　Two avid fishermen go on a fishing trip. They rent all the equipment: the reels, the rods, the wading suits, the rowboat, the car, and even a cabin in the woods. They spend a fortune.

　　兩個殷切的釣魚愛好者要進行一次釣魚之旅。他們租了一切所需的器材：魚線盤，釣竿，淺水服，小船，汽車，甚至一間林中小屋。為此，他們花了好多的錢。

　　The first day they go fishing, but they don't catch anything. The same thing happens on the second day, and on the third day. It goes on like this until finally, on the last day of their vacation, one of the men catches a fish.

　　第一天去釣魚，他們什麼也沒釣到。第二天和第三天也是如此。直到最後，在他們旅行的最後一天，其中一個人釣到了一條魚。

　　As they're driving home they're really depressed. One guy turns to the other and says, "Do you realize that this one lousy fish we caught cost us fifteen hundred dollars?"

　　回家的路上，他們都感到十分沮喪。一個人對另一個人說：“你發現沒有?為了釣這條倒黴的魚，我們花了1500塊錢?”

　　The other guy says, "Wow! It's a good thing we didn't catch any more!"

　　另一個人說：“噢!幸虧我們沒有釣到更多的魚。”

　　：Little Voice

　　A man was mowing his lawn when he heard his neighbor, who happened to be a blonde, come out of her house. She opened her mailbox, looked inside and slammed it shut. She stompedher foot and went back inside. The man thought ''how weird.''

　　一個男人正在除草，聽見他的鄰居正好走出家門。這個鄰居恰好是個金髮碧眼美女。她開啟郵箱，往裡面看，然後又關上了它。她踱踱腳，轉身回去。這個人覺得好奇怪啊!

　　A few minutes passed and sure enough, the blonde came out of her house again, checked her mail box, stamped her foot and went back inside. The man stopped mowing and checked her mailbox to see what was so wrong with it. After seeing nothing, he went back to mowing just shrugging his shoulders.

　　幾分鐘過去了，金髮美女又走出了房門，檢查郵箱，跺跺腳又回去。這個人停止除草，去檢查她的郵箱是否出了問題。沒有發現什麼，他聳了聳肩繼續除草。

　　As soon as he heard her coming out again, he shut off his mowing machine and went up to her. ''What in the world are you doing, coming out here every five minutes?''

　　當他再次聽見她出來的時候，他關掉除草機走到她的面前。“你每五分鐘出來一次，到底在做什麼呀?”

　　The blonde looked up at the man and said, ''Well, you see, there's this little voice in my house that keeps on saying, 'You've got mail,' but when I come out here to check, I don't have any.''

　　金髮美女抬頭看看這個人說道：“你看，我聽到我房間這個微弱的聲音一直在說，‘你有信件來了，’可是當我出來看的時候卻發現什麼都沒有。”