有關搞笑的英語短文欣賞

　　隨著社會經濟的發展和全球化的深入,學習者對於英語學習的要求也發生了變化。英語越來越成為人們使用的一種工具。小編精心收集了有關搞笑的英語短文，供大家欣賞學習!

　　有關搞笑的英語短文：Punsihment

　　A man died and was taken to his place of eternal torment by the devil.

　　As he passed sulphurous pits and shrieking sinners, he saw a man he recognized as a lawyer snuggling up to a beautiful woman.

　　'That's unfair!' he cried. 'I have to roast for all eternity, and that lawyer gets to spend it with a beautiful woman.'

　　'Shut up,' barked the devil, jabbing the man with his pitchfork.

　　'Who are you to question that woman's punishment?'

　　有關搞笑的英語短文：Marriage Made In Heaven

　　A couple were driving to a church to get married. On the way, they got into a car accident and died. When they arrive in heaven, they see St. Peter at the gate. They ask him if he could arrange it so they could marry in heaven.

　　St. Peter tells them that he'll do his best to work on it for them.

　　Three months pass by and the couple hear nothing. They bump into St. Peter and ask him about the marriage.

　　He says, "I'm still working on it."

　　Two years pass by and no marriage.

　　St. Peter again assures them that he's working on it.

　　Finally after twenty long years, St. Peter comes running with a priest and tells the couple it's time for their wedding.

　　The couple marry and live happily for a while. But after a few months the couple go and find St. Peter and tell him things are not working out, and that they want to get a divorce.

　　"Can you arrange it for us?" they ask.

　　St. Peter replies, "Are you kidding?! It took me twenty years to find a priest up here. How am I gonna find you a lawyer?"

　　有關搞笑的英語短文：Tickets, Please

　　Three lawyers and three engineers were traveling by train to the same meeting. At the station, the lawyers each buy a ticket but the engineers buy just one. When asked why, the engineers coyly said "You'll see."

　　They all board the train, the lawyers taking seats, but the three engineers all crowding into the bathroom. After the train has left, the conductor comes around and takes the lawyers tickets and knocks on the bathroom door and says, "Ticket Please." An arm stretches out from the bathroom and the conductor takes the proffered ticket. The lawyers were very impressed.

　　On the return trip, the lawyers proposed to emulate the gearheads and bought only one ticket. To their amazement, the engineers bought no ticket at all. When asked, the engineers said, "You'll see."

　　All board the train and the lawyers and engineers cram into separate bathrooms to await the conductor. After a few minutes,

　　one of the gearheads emerges from the bathroom, goes over to the lawyers' bathroom, knocks on the door and says: "Ticket please."