增強語句表現力的方法

　　一、避免使用語意弱的“be”動詞。

　　1、把句中的表語轉換為不同的修飾語。例如：

　　Weak: The trees are bare. The grass is brown. The landscape seems drab. brown grass and bare trees form a drab landscape. ***轉換為前置定語***

　　Or: The landscape, bare and brown, begged for spring green. ***轉換為並列結構作後置定語***

　　2、將作表語用的形容詞或名詞變為行為動詞。


　　例如：

　　1*** Weak: The team members are good players.

　　Revision: The team members play well.

　　2*** Weak: One worker’s plan is the elimination of tardiness.

　　Revision: One worker’s plan eliminates tardiness.

　　3、在以“here”或“there”開頭的句子中，把“be”動詞後的名詞代詞變成改寫句的主語。例如：

　　1*** Weak: There is no opportunity for promotion.

　　Revision: No opportunity for promotion exists.

　　2*** Weak: Here are the books you ordered.

　　Revision: The books you ordered have arrived.

　　二、多用語意具體的動詞，保持句意簡潔明瞭。例如：

　　1、Poor: My supervisor went past my desk.

　　Better: My supervisor sauntered ***=walked slowly*** past my desk.

　　2、Poor: She is a careful shopper.

　　Better: She compares prices and quality.

　　三、儘量運用主動語態。例如：

　　1、Weak: The organization has been supported by charity.

　　Better: Charity has supported the organization.

　　2、Weak: The biscuits were stacked on a plate.

　　Better: Mother stacked the biscuits on a plate.

　　四、防止使用語意冗長累贅的詞語。例如：

　　1、Wordy: My little sister has a preference for chocolate milk.

　　Improved: My little sister prefers chocolate milk.

　　2、Wordy: We are in receipt of your letter and intend to follow your recommendations.

　　Improved: We have received your letter and intended to follow your recommendation.

　　3、Redundant: We had a serious crisis at school yesterday when our chemistry laboratory caught fire.

　　Improved: We had a crisis at school yesterday when our chemistry laboratory caught fire.

　　4、Redundant: My sister and I bought the same, identical dress in different stores.

　　Improved: My sister and I bought the same dress in different stores.

　　五、杜絕濫用陳舊詞語或難懂的專業術語。例如：

　　1、Weak: They will not agree to his proposals in any shape or form.

　　Improved: They will not agree to any of his proposals.

　　2、Weak: I need her financial input before I can guesstimate our expenditures next fall.

　　Improved: I need her financial figures before I can estimate our expenditures next fall.