英語簡單笑話帶翻譯

　　冷笑話作為一種新興的語言現象，越來越受到大家的關注，尤其在網路、雜誌、微博、電影上十分盛行。小編整理了，歡迎閱讀!

　　篇一

　　The mothers of four priests got together and were discussing their sons. "My son is amonsignor," said the first proud woman. "When he enters a room, people say, 'Hello,Monsignor'."

　　The second mother went on, "My son is a bishop. When he enters a room, people say,'Hello, Your Excellency'."

　　"My son is a cardinal." continued the next one. "When he enters a room, people say, 'Hello,Your Eminence'.

　　" The fourth mother thought for a moment. "My son is six-foot-ten and weighs 300pounds, " she said. "When he enters a room, people say, 'Oh, my God'!"

　　四位牧師的母親聚到一起談論她們的兒子。“我的兒子是個教士，”第一位母親自豪地說道，“他進入房間，人們都說，‘您好，閣下’。”

　　第二為母親說：“我的兒子是位主教。他進入房間，人們都稱，‘您好，大人’。”

　　“我的兒子是位紅衣主教，”第三位母親接著說，“他走進房間，人們都說，‘您好，尊敬的主教大人’。”

　　第四位母親略思片刻。“我的兒子身高六英尺十，體重三百磅，”她說，“他要是走入房間，人們都說‘哦，我的上帝!’”

　　篇二

　　Younger Scout: How can I tell the difference between a mushroom and a toadstool?

　　Older Scout: Just eat one before you go to bed. If you wake up the next morning, it was amushroom.

　　年少的童子軍：我怎樣才能把蘑菇和毒菌區別開呢?

　　年長的童子軍：上床前吃一個。如果你第二天早上醒來，那就是蘑菇。

　　篇三

　　Teacher: Walter, why don't you wash your face? I can see what you had for breakfast thismorning.

　　Walter: What was it?

　　Teacher: Eggs.

　　Walter: Wrong. That was yesterday.

　　老　師：沃爾特，你為什麼不洗臉?我看得出你今天早飯吃了什麼。

　　沃爾特：我吃了什麼?

　　老　師：雞蛋。

　　沃爾特：錯了，老師。那是昨天吃的。

　　篇四

　　A shoplifter was caught red-handed trying to steal a watch from a jewelry store. "Listen,"said the shoplifter, "I know you don't want any trouble either. What do you say I just buy thewatch, and we forget about this?"

　　The manager agreed and wrote up the sales slip. The crook looked at the slip and said, "This isa little more than I intended to spend.Can you show me something less expensive?"

　　一個小偷在一家珠寶店企圖偷走一隻手錶的時候被當場擒獲。“聽著，”小偷說，“我知道你們也不想惹麻煩。我把這隻表買下，然後我們就當什麼也沒發生，你看怎樣?”

　　經理表示同意，然後列了一張售貨單。小偷看著單子說道：“這比我最初的預算稍稍高了一點。你們還有沒有便宜一點兒東西。"